criminal minds oneshots

♡ what's going on?

i sighed, getting out of bed and going straight to the bathroom. i dropped by the side of the toilet but thankfully held back my sick this time. i felt awful, terrified. the only person who saw the horrors of that room was never here. when JJ adopted me, i thought i was going to get this luxury life with a mum who finally cared and put the attention in but recently, i'd felt completely forgotten about. after her maternity leave was over, will was looking after the two boys and he didn't have much time for me- thinking i could fend for myself. at 16 i pretty much could but i still needed my parents around, especially on nights like this.

the nightmares had been back for a while now, getting worse and worse. i wanted to go back to therapy but i couldn't speak to will about it. he didn't know what i went through. only jj. i got off the floor and headed downstairs quietly. i opened the back door and sat on the swing on the porch, letting the cold air calm me down and ground me.

i don't know how long i stayed out there fore but the sound of a car on the gravel drive woke me up. i didn't move though, it was probably a neighbour. JJ had only been gone for two days, she wouldn't be back yet. however, five minutes later, i heard the back door slide open.

"will is that you?" she said, looking over at the swing but i looked back at her.

"oh y/n it's you! what you doing out here so late hm?" she said gently. she looked tired, really tired.

"i couldn't sleep," i replied. she came to sit beside me and we looked out over the lake together.

"i don't think i will be able to tonight either," she sighed.

"do you want to talk about it?" i asked, being polite.

"no darling," she chuckled. "it's not for your little head to worry about." she leaned back in the swing and caressed my blonde hair.

"do you wanna talk about why you're up?" i stayed quiet for a few minutes. i suppose this was gonna be my only chance.

"the nightmares are back," i told her.

"about the farm?" she asked. i nodded.

"but, but you don't come anymore." i used to be able to train myself to stay in the dream and wait for jj and the team to come and rescue me but she hadn't been. the torture just excelled, i wasn't rescued or saved.

"how long has it been like that love?"

"since you went back to work." i sighed. i hate having to rely on her.

"why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"i didn't have a chance too," i shrugged, being honest. she nodded, understanding.

"have you spoken to will?" i shook my head. "he doesn't know you can't sleep most nights? why haven't you gotten in with him?"

"you're not there," i said simply. "jj, you rescued me. you got me out of that farm and you took me home. not will. i, i need you," i felt small and vulnerable. she sighed and moved over on the swing, pulling me into her arms.

"i'm here now love, i'm sorry." she held me and began to swing the swing. we swayed and i settled in her arms. it was like magic.

"can you sleep with me tonight?"

"i can baby, shall we go in?" she asked. i nodded and sat up, beginning to feel the cold.

half an hour later and you and jj were curled up in your bed. you had a big bed but it was nice to have her close. your saviour.

"do you want me to call your therapist in the morning?" she asked you, playing with your hair as you laid on her chest.

"yes please." she smiled and held you tightly. then, as she did with henry, she began to tell you a story.

"once upon a time, there was a castle, hidden way in a forest..."

you fell asleep to the sound of her voice, feeling her chest move up and down as she breathed and the heart beating too. you'd needed this.