I Fancy You: James Sirius Potter

61. Five Years Later

Five years after graduating from Hogwarts I still remain close with Albus Potter. In fact, I'm still incredibly tight with almost all of my friends from school. Albus, Scorpius, Ali, Conor, and Desmond. We all avoid the quidditch playing elephant in the room of course. Which is, I'm sure, the most difficult for Albus.
We're meeting for tea on this rainy September afternoon. I rush into the tea shop just before one o'clock and see my sweet boy (who has to constantly remind me he is in fact a man now) sitting at a table waiting for me.
"Hope I didn't keep you waiting too long," I say apologetically.
"Not at all! I actually just got here a couple minutes ago myself. Hello dear friend," he says while giving me a hug.
"Hello," I say back, squeezing him.
"I took the liberty of getting us cake." He looks nervous. "I have something to tell you."
"Did Scorpius finally propose?"
"No but someone else did." When he sees the puzzled look on my face he makes me take a bite of cake before breaking the news. "James proposed to Morgan," he tells me.
Morgan has been dating James for two years now. She comes from money. Muggle money. She still doesn't know James is a wizard or what sport he actually plays for a living.
"Oh. Wow. That's... really great news." I take another bite of cake.
"Is it?" He takes another bite as well.
"Is it not?" I study his face. Albus made it clear he was never a fan of Morgan. A spoiled rotten brat he'd called her on the one occasion he discussed his brother and his new girlfriend.
"Of course it's not. She's not right for him. Not because she's a muggle but because she's... just a shit person."
It's hard for me to imagine someone not getting along with Albus.
"How do your parents feel about her?"
"They often bring you up," he says with a smirk.
"That's awful!"
"She's awful!" He leans back and looks around. When his expression changes I turn to see what he's looking at. A very wet, a very rushed looking James hurrying into the tea shop.
"What the hell did you do?" I whisper through gritted teeth. But there's no time for him to answer.
"Wow! I feel like I'm looking at a ghost!" I hear from behind me.
"I look that bad?" I say with a chuckle.
"Oh no! Not at all! You look great, as always." He dries himself off with a spell and then awkwardly gives me a hug.
"Albus didn't mention you'd be joining us," I tell him. "What a nice surprise," I add so I don't sound so rude.
"Yeah, I wasn't aware you'd be here myself. A nice surprise it is though," he throws in. I'm sure he's just as irritated to see me as I am to see him.
"Yeah, well I can almost never get time with either of you and I figured you're both free at the same time so why should I sacrifice time with either one of you?" Albus gives us a smile.
James goes to order himself something while Albus scoots over to be not directly across from me, leaving that space open for James.
"Are you out of your damn mind? He's engaged!" I kick him under the table.
"So? He's just catching up with his old friend," Albus says deviously.
"His old friend who he hasn't been friends with since seventh year of school!"
"Oh please. He's gotta still have feelings for you."
"He doesn't! Which is why he's marrying someone else! And besides, I don't have feelings for him."
"Oh sure okay," he says rolling his eyes.
James returns to the table before I can argue my case. It's awkward and quiet.
"So. How is everything?" I ask with a fake smile.
"Great actually. I'm doing well on the team, I actually just signed a contract worth more pay."
"That's great James! My dad actually went to a game a while ago, he said you're a hell of a player. Dylan went with him."
"They did? They should've said something, I could've gotten them in for free. At a great level as well."
"Oh I doubt they wanted to bother you," I say politely. The truth is they wouldn't dare contact him. Everyone kind of accepts that James is a taboo subject.
"Next time," he says smiling more naturally.
"I hear you're engaged. Congratulations." When I say this he suddenly straightens up and loses the smile.
"You heard? Uh... yeah. Yeah recently. She's... really great." He nods.
"Well that's great. I'm happy for you." I check the time and act surprised. "Oh shoot, guys I gotta get going. It's been really great catching up though." I stand up and James stands immediately.
"It's been really lovely seeing you," James says to my surprise.
"Yeah you too. Albus it was lovely seeing you too. Gotta go guys! Bye!" I rush out before I can hear another word leave his mouth.

James
  As Ellie rushes out of the shop I fight the very strong urge to chase after her. She's only gotten more beautiful over the years. I knew I missed her but I didn't even realize how much until I saw her.
"Why would you do that?" I ask Albus. I don't sound angry. Just quiet.
"Do what?" He sips his tea and grabs Ellie's cake to finish it.
"You know what."
"Because you're so convinced that you're in love with Morgan when you're not. You had a feeling you weren't and now you know. What you had with Ellie was love. You ran from that, you were young and stupid. Then came Daniel and you knew you really messed up then." He looks over and me and furrows his eyebrows. "What happened after Daniel died, James? Why did you stop talking completely?"
"I don't know," I lie. That's no use with Albus though. He sees right through it.
"I don't know how long you're going to lie to yourself but you might want to consider stopping before it's too late, mate." Albus stands up and walks out, leaving me there to sit in my own thoughts.

That night while I'm alone I decide to write a letter.
Ellie,
It really was lovely seeing you. I was hoping that maybe you and I could meet for tea just the two of us? We have a lot to catch up on. Please say yes. For old times sake. I'll make myself available anytime you want.
  Yours, James
  I reread how desperate I sound but I am. I also realize signing it 'yours' might be inappropriate. It is true though. When I send it off with my owl I get a pit in my stomach.

Ellie
  I reread the letter James wrote about a hundred times. I find myself obsessing over the smallest details. There's no way I can write back. There's no way I can meet with him.
James,
Meet me in Hogsmeade at three o'clock tomorrow. For old times sake.
Ellie
I am so stupid.