rough patch hardin and tessa

chapter 37

hardin
its been 4 months since emery was born.
i have been looking at places for me and tessa to go so i can give her this ring.its December and its nearly her birthday which is on the 19th so close the Christmas.so i have thinking going somewhere on the 17th then coming back home on the 24th for Christmas.somwhere i know tessa wants to go is icland to go and see the northan lights as they are really good there.
"i swear everytime i see you on that laptop your planning to go somewhere"tessa says walking in our room"what are you planning"
As she says that i book the plane tickets.
"get your bags packed with warm but nice clothes to go to see the northern lights in Iceland"i say showing her the plane tickets.
she jumps on me and kisses me.
"your full of surprises"she says.
"you deserve this trip"i reply.
"i can ask mum to have em while we are gone or do you want her to come with?"i ask
"i think trish would love that.she could stay here with her.i feel like we need time to be hardin and tessa.not mummy and daddy"she says"when is it?"she asks.
"17th to the 24th"i say.on the 19th when we watch the Northern lights and i will give her that ring.she deserves it.

fastforward to the 18th.
tessa and i are missing em but we know shes happy with my mum.we just came back from dinner and tessa is showing.she has been less stressed.i dont think she has taken her pills since the 15th which is a good sign.
im looking at the ring,imaging it on her finger this time tomorrow.on her birthday which is even better.
i hear her footsteps and quickly put it back in its spot in its box behind the draws.
"my stomach hurts"tess complains.
"maybe cause you stuffed youself with food"i laugh.
"maybe"she smiles.
"i will go get you some pain killers and water but after that i think you'll need sleep for your big day tomorrow"i say.
"you dont need to do anything for my birthday.i have you, emery and you brung me here to somewhere ive always wanted to go.i think those are the best presents anyone could ask for"she says.
"too late. you know i will allways get you and do stuff for you on your birthday tess.because i love you"i say passing her the painkiller and the water.

she looks so beautiful and happy i love it.im hoping that she will stay like this.i hate seeing the drained,stressed and inpain tessa.it makes me feel terrible knowing i cant just make it go away.ppd sucks and alot of women in the world suffered with it the way tessa does and maybe for longer.i dont think she will suffer anylonger soon. but you never know.

the next morning i wake tessa up and she seems in a bad mood. she hasn't been in one of these moods for days. i was hoping she wouldn't today on her special day.
"happybirthday baby"i say kissing her and she smiles a little "thankyou hardin.
"are you okay" i ask and she shrugs
"i dont know what im feeling.im feeling everything at once.happyness sadness angry joy and i just need it to stop.i dont even know why im angry"she reply. i go get her ppd pils and water.
"maybe its because you haven't taken these in a few days"i say.
"i was hoping i wouldn't hafto.i feel bad cause im like this when i know your trying to make this a good day"she frowns.
"the day has barely started yet.plus what i have planned isnt till later on"i say refering to me giving her the ring.thats the most imortant part of today and i feel nervous and im not sure why"if you want to sleep for an hour of so thats fine.anything for you tess.you presents are ready when you are"
"i want you next to me"she says and i climb in next to her.

an hour or so later she gets up and is in a better mood.and she opens the stuff i got her."i want you to wear this tonight"i say holding up the outfit i got her.
"what are we doing tonight"she says with a confused smile.
"guess"i shrug with a smug smile.
"its obviously the northern lights"she laughs and walks up to me and hugs me.
"i will forever be grateful for you.i love you"she whispers in my ear.
"i love you more"i whisper kissing her on the head.

●●●
her beautiful eyes stare at the vivid gloomy sky and her mouth forms a small smile.
"its so mythical looking.i never thought i would see this in real life"she rambles.
"it is.you look so memorised"i say.
"i am"she replys"thankyou so much.for everything"
"anything for you baby"i say putting my hand in my pocket touching the ring box"i need to ask you somthing"i say and she nods and turns to me.
"thereasa Lynn Young.i have been inlove with you since i set my eyes on you.we have had our ups and downs but we are still here together.you forgave me when i shouldnt of been forgiven.you belived i could change when no one else thought i could and had no hope in me. you changed my whole perspective on life in a good way. Like we even have our own daughter together which is something i would have never even thought of without meeting you. Will you marry me?"i question and by the end of me saying that shes in tears,with her hands over her mouth and her head nodding repeatedly.

"yes...yes i will"she manages to say and tales the shiny ring out of the box.i place it on her engagement finger. Theres a couple of people around here who just witnessed this and are clapping and cheering.
she randomly jumps into my arms and i catch her.
"i dont think any words can explain how happy i feel right now"she says as i carry her away.
"i know..do you like the ring"i ask.
"i love the ring.i actually saw it in that jewellery shop and i wanted it...wait when did you get this"she wonders.
"the same day i got your necklace.no one knew but me"i answer.
as we get back to our apartment tessa is over excited.she is telling everyone.i get a notification from my phone.

"congratulations brother"the text reads from landon.He and his girlfriend spilt not long ago so he has been distant.ive felt bad but i don't know how to confort anyone if im honest.Even whenever tessa has been upset i have had no clue what to do.and i feel useless.
"thanks.see you soon"i reply and tessa takes my phone out my hand.she climbs on top of me in her bra and panties.we haven't done this in a while.
"god tessa"i say as she starts unbuttoning my button up shirt.