ALIVE | GOJOU SATORU

chapter thirteen

You're walking home.

It's dark and you're freezing. It's early January and here you are walking home. But you can't even feel anything, you're just numb.

The door is locked and you don't have your things with you, so your only choice is to knock.

Taking a seat on the porch, the door finally opens and it's Satoru. His eyes scan the porch before they land on you, and he rushes toward you. "Baby, you're freezing." His voice is frantic.

He helps you up and into the house. "Tsumiki, get a blanket."

Her eyes widen and rush over to the couch where Satoru has placed you.

Your hands are covered in blood.

"Mom?" You say aloud, head turning to look at her lifeless body on the floor.

Naoya steps out. "She just couldn't keep her mouth shut, could she? It's a shame."

You fall to the floor, hands pressing against her head to stop the bleeding. Even if it did no good, you weren't thinking clearly.

"Kids, go to your room." Satoru glances back at them.

Megumi is standing there, watching as you sit there in silence. He's distraught. He can't move. It takes Tsumiki to move him from his spot, pulling him down the hallway.

Satoru covers you with the blanket before getting in front of you. "Baby, what happened? Talk to me."

You finally look into his eyes and his heart breaks.

He doesn't know what to do.

"I have to get my things." You finally say and his eyes widen, confused as he watches you stand up from the couch.

The blanket drops to the floor and you start walking down the hallway.

"Hey." Satoru tries to stop you. "Baby."

You stop, letting out a sigh. "What?"

He's staring at you. "Something happened. Your hands are all bloody and you've walked all the way home from your mothers in the freezing cold. It could snow."

You're afraid to say too much. You don't want to put him or the kids in any danger. "My mother is dead and I'm leaving. I'm going back home."

His ears can't believe what you're saying. He doesn't believe you. "There's no way."

"Believe it, Gojou." It hurts you to say that, and you can't let him see the expression on your face so you turn away, continuing to make your way into the bedroom.

As you begin to pack your things, he finally makes it into the room.

"Why are you going back to him?" Satoru is heartbroken. "He's done nothing but hurt you."

You shake your head, shoving your clothes into a bag. "Because it's easier for me to live that way."

"Have you forgotten that I know when you lie to me!" He slams his fist on the dresser beside him.

There's nothing you can do at this point. If you decide to stay, Naoya and his family will just come after them, and then you. Saying anything to Satoru is too much. You turn to face him. "We're getting married."

His eyes close and he shakes his head repeatedly. "I don't believe you."

Your arms fall to your side. "And I'm pregnant. I found out at the hospital."

Satoru stands there, eyes wide as he stares at you. He has no idea how to feel about all of this new information. It's coming out too fast. There is no time to process it fully, he just knows that right now he has to stop you from leaving. "Whatever happened, we can talk about it. There's more that you're not telling me."

"Nothing you say is going to make me change my mind. Just tell the kids I'll see them soon." You continue to pack, turning away from him.

Tears well in Satoru's eyes. "So your mother dies and you just come back home frozen as ice...talking about you're going back home when we both know that this is your home, you're getting married and you're pregnant. How am I supposed to handle taking all of this in so quickly?"

"Figure it out." You say, walking into the bathroom to grab some of your other belongings.

He shakes his head. "No."

You remain silent, walking into the room and putting everything into the bag. Then you zip it up and pick it up, turning around and walking past him.

"No." He repeats, following after you down the hallway. "You're not leaving me."

Stopping in your tracks, you face him and he stops.

His heart drops as he notices your wet face. You're crying and haven't even noticed as your face is still cold from walking home. "Don't leave me." Satoru shakes his head, sniffling. "You can't just fucking leave me."

"I'm sorry." You say softly and stand there momentarily, looking into his eyes before turning away from him and heading for the door.

He doesn't know what else to do. His eyes squeeze shut and his fists ball up. "I love you."

The words alone shock you enough to make you stop opening the door, hand on the doorknob. You can't turn around, you can't look at him. He's just made this a lot harder for you.

"I fucking love you. Ever since we were 15, I have been in love with you. And up until recently I've thought it was just a really good friendship, but friends don't do the things that we do. Or say the things we say to each other. I love you." Satoru's eyes are open and he's staring at your figure standing in front of the door.

If circumstances were different, you'd turn around and jump into his arms and stay with him.

Your heart is screaming at you to stay but your head says otherwise. And it's best not to follow your heart.

Letting out a breath, your hand turns the knob. "It's best to simply let it go." And you left.

-

crazy chapter 

I'm still updating on time but I haven't been writing as much. I've been busy and kind of just trying to take time for myself.

I appreciate all the love, it really gives me motivation to write more.

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