Lost Smile//Connor Bedard

2.

Angelina's POV

The rest of the school day has managed to go by rather quickly. I tried my hardest to avoid everyone and it worked pretty well. I had my headphones in my ears as I walked down the crowded hallway, ignoring every person i walked by to get to my locker on the second floor. I finally reached it and opened it, placing all of the textbooks I knew I'd need for tomorrow inside.

"Did you not hear what I said, loser?" A voice boomed as I felt my headphones being ripped from ears. Before I could turn around to see who it was, a hand came flying across my face, knocking me to the floor instantly.

I was stunned.

I looked up at and saw Alexandra, Steph(Taylor's girlfriend), and Brianna(Tyler's girlfriend), all standing above me. They had looks of anger on their faces, I gulped loudly at the sight.

"Who the fuck do you think you are? Ignoring me when I'm talking to you?" Alex yelled.

"I-I h-had my h-headphones-" I was cut off by another hard slap in the face. This time I felt my eyes fill with tears as I grabbed my now stinging, and most likely red cheek.

"I don't care. You listen when we're talking to you" Steph chimed.

"You're so pathetic. I don't know what Connor ever saw in you" Brianna said. Making the girls laugh loudly. "Yeah it's no wonder why he left you. You're nothing but a loser. An attention seeking loser" her words had hit hard. Was I really that bad of a person? What did Connor see in me?

I can easily explain what he had seen in me. My popularity, the beauty I once had, the spark I once shared with everyone I was with, but most importantly the smile I always had on my face. I was everything he had said he always wanted. But everything I had has disappeared and all of the words they were saying to me were nothing but true. The hurt I felt, the sadness and everything else has made me realize that I didn't deserve to ever have those things again.

After the girls were done with their verbal tirade I picked myself up off the floor and quickly picked up my books before running off to the door. The hallways were now cleared so there was not one person I'd have to worry about staring at me with nothing but disgust. It was a hurtful thing if I'm being honest. These people didn't even know who I was so who are they to judge me.

"Hey Angelina are you okay?" I turned around and rolled my eyes at who stood behind me.

"What do you want Connor? Here to finish what they started?" I spoke, the bitterness in my tone makes him frown.

"I-I don't know" he rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, looking down at the ground.

"Just leave me alone" I mumble, tears spilling down my cheeks. I didn't even feel them fill my eyes, they just slid down my face like a waterfall. I sobbed loudly as I ran out of the school and down the road, hoping he didn't come after me.

Even though part of me wished he did. I turned back and saw no one behind me. I knew he wasn't going to be there. Why would he care? His life is perfect without me in it. I feel as if his life has actually gotten better since we broke up. I just wish that my life was back to the way it was. When I was happy, when I had friends, when I was popular.

I want my old life back, but most importantly, I want my mom back. I knew she would give me all of the motherly advice I needed when Connor left. Now all I have is an alcoholic dead beat dad who couldn't give two shits about what happened to me. I could be killed and he still wouldn't care. As long as he has his booze, nothing else in the world mattered.

I finally reached home and walked inside, throwing my bag on the nearby couch. I looked up and see my dad, sitting in his chair, a bottle of beer in his hand and the empty case sitting beside him on the floor.

"Why the fuck are you home so late?" My dad yelled as he slurred every word. I was startled. I didn't even think he noticed me come in.

"I-I was d-doing an assignment" I lied. He rolled his eyes and took a big swig of his beer, "no wonder why you're lonely. No one likes nerds" he laughed his loud drunken laugh at his own joke.

I sighed and made my way upstairs to my room. I walked to the bathroom and gasped at the reflection. I had a big bruise on my right cheek, and a small scratch on the other one. Worthless was the only word I could think of. Between the words from the girls and the ones from my father, I am not sure which ones hurt more.

Why do they have to treat me this way? Why can't I just be left alone? I often found myself wondering these things. I often wondered why my friends all abandoned me.

Or so called friends. I shouldn't even call them that. It should be more like 'fake friends'. I turned on the hot water and stood under it as I always did, just this time I grabbed my razor.

The razor I didn't use to shave, but the razor I had used for something much worse.