Arranged to the Mafia King

89 • Chances

"So...what would you like to talk about?"

I sat before Titan and our dad, seeing him look at me awkwardly. My arms were folded to my chest because this isn't what I wanted.

"I don't want you to speak for him," I tell Titan harshly, seeing him look at me in confusion, "This has to be all him. If he can't even muster one damn sentence to me, then we're wasting our time."

"Jun, come on. I'm trying to start a conversation here." Titan pleads with me, but I didn't...care. "You don't think I don't feel this awkwardness? I'm trying to be the mediator, the conversation starter. Can you accept that much?"

My lips were tight together, looking at my dad.

He was looking away from me and he just looked...looked stupid! I'm right here, in front of him, and he can't even fucking look at me!

My hatred is rising the more he refuses to look at me.

"You have nothing to say to your first born? The one you supposedly lost your mind over? I'm guessing not, that can't be true. How is that possible with what I've heard? Your actions tell me something else, there was no way you...missed me. Even when I was back before you, you avoided me it seemed. Still to this day, you fucking avoid me unless I pull your hand and you have no damn choice." I sneer in disgust at him, seeing him finally look at me. "Oh? Now you can look at me? I wonder why? You couldn't look at me before just to simply start a conversation. What gives?"

"You say all of these things that are simply not-."

"They're true." I interrupt him, sitting back in my chair as I ignore Titan's warning with his eyes. "If you really loved me and wanted me so bad, you wouldn't have settled with Evander's words. You would search hard and try until you couldn't try again. Every time Damian went missing, you found him so easily. It's not like I was being hidden in some top secret place. I was right there, if you looked hard enough. You didn't, and Damian found me within a short amount of time; so you just didn't try it seems. How pathetic."

I saw my dad's hands ball into fists. He was clearly becoming more and more agitated.

"Then there's Titan, he was born weak and pathetic. You could've given up on that, but it seems you didn't. I remember seeing you come and beat Lulu up for what he did to Damian while he held him. Then you glanced at me, no emotion. I was beside my mom, and I knew immediately you were my dad. Except you didn't seem to care, they were your primary focus. Not me, the son you were looking for!" I stood up fast, beginning to become more and more angry.

I just didn't understand!

Why...doesn't he love me? Why doesn't he love me as much as he loves the others? I'm fucking trying over here...

"I can't do this Titan." I finally say, and I saw him stand up quickly. "This isn't going to fucking work! I can never be enough, he hates me! I'm not...I'm not Damian's child and I'm not you, so what's the fucking point?"

"I don't...hate you-."

"Well, I hate you." I interrupt him, seeing my dad look away again.

I feel a hand grab my arm, and I saw Titan trying to sooth my nerves. Except I shove him back, shaking my head quickly.

"Nothing you do or say...will work. You won't be able to understand because you're not me. No one can relate to me, especially you, Titan. You're living the life I should be having, you know?" I croak, collapsing into my seat as he crouched before me. I stood back up, not wanting to feel pitied by him of all people. "I should be the Mafia King, right now. My last name may be King on my birth certificate, but I don't even feel like I'm a part of this family. I don't think you want me to be-."