Cassie Potter - Lady Gryffindor

Chapter eighteen

Chapter Eighteen

After Harry had said goodnight to his parents portraits, he went through to his bedroom. His mind was racing from the day he had just experienced. He had finally been able to have a conversation with his parents. His parents. He just couldn't believe it, he knew they weren't alive and it wasn't really the same but oh did it feel amazing. His dad was hilarious and charming. His mother had a softness when she spoke to him but the anger in her eyes when she'd heard what happened since they'd died was unreal. He never knew where his temper came from but looking at his mother's face, he knew it was from her. It felt so nice to see something of himself in his parents. He had never had that, never been able to physically see it before. He'd been told all the stories of course from various people who had known his parents but it never felt the same. Now though, now he knew, he'd seen it with his own eyes.

Through all their laughing and joking though, Harry noticed his godfather heal right in front of his eyes. The empty shell and the sadness that sometimes overwhelmed Sirius was slowly fading with each passing moment. Everyone always said that Sirius Black and James Potter were platonic soulmates. Harry always thought that was a strange thing to say, but seeing it now, he understood. They were truly the other half of each other. They reminded him of the twins, finishing each others sentences and thoughts. Sirius had laughed so loud at one point, Harry had jumped out of his skin. He had never heard him sound so joyful and happy. It felt amazing to see. It wasn't until they were saying goodnight that he realised his Aunt Cassie wasn't by their side. He didn't understand, he was confused. He expected her to be just as happy as Sirius and himself. He knew she had her own demons, different from Sirius but similar pain. It was with that thought that he decided to go and find Regulus. He knew Regulus had been there with his Aunt all these years and he needed to understand why she wasn't as desperate as them to speak to his parents.

Regulus hadn't gone with them today, he hadn't felt it was his place. He had instead stayed at home and continued to do research on the Horcruxes. He knew they had destroyed the diary, the cup, the locket and the one in Harry, that made 4. If they were correct and he was going after 7 as the most magically powerful number then they still had 3 more to go. He wasn't sure if he got the chance to make them all before 1981 but he had to know for sure before they went after him. He had heard them all come back, he had heard Cassie head for her bedroom. He knew today would be harder for her than she would want to let on to anyone. Afterall, he was there when everything went to shit. He had sat with her night after night as she cried and raged. She had accidental magic like he had never seen. By the time the first year had passed he was certain she wouldn't survive. The fight had come and gone in her over the years, sometimes the overwhelming grief would take over her entire being, other times her fight would overcome everything else. She has lost more than just her brother and sister in law, more than just her fiance that night but they didn't know and he wasn't allowed to tell. He heard a faint knock at his door and when he said enter, he wasn't expecting to see Harry standing there.

"Um Regulus? Sorry to bother you so late but could I talk to you?" Harry stuttered out, he was nervous and worried. He hadn't really had many conversations with Sirius' brother before.

"Sure Harry. Come in and have a seat." Regulus replied gesturing to the lounge chair in the corner. Harry cautiously entered the large room, looking around. Regulus room was large, it had sage green painted walls, the bedroom furniture along with the desk were all dark mahogany wood and the soft furnishings were various shades of green with touches of silver and black. It was actually quite relaxing even it was so Slytherin, Harry thought. He took his seat in the corner.

"What can I do for you Harry?" Regulus asked.

"We got my parents portraits, they were in the vault. Sirius was right but there was also letters for all of us. I haven't read mine yet and I don't think Sirius has either because Aunt Cassie had his. The thing is, um, Aunt Cassie didn't stick around when we got home. She didn't speak to dad, she just disappeared. I thought she'd be happy to see him, I thought-. Well I thought she'd be there with us." He said cutting himself off and looking down at his feet.

Oh, Regulus thought. He was worried about his Aunt and didn't understand. He couldn't asked Sirius because he hadn't been there, so he'd come to Regulus.

"Ah I understand, you think I might be able to explain it to you?" Regulus asked softly. Harry nodded his head yes.

"The thing is Harry, a lot of what your Aunt went through is hers to tell, if she so chooses. However, I can tell you that I think she is entirely overcome with guilt. Guilt at not saving James and Lily. Not saving Sirius but most of all and this I know for a fact, she is riddled with guilt for not saving you."

"Me?" Harry gasped.

"Yes, you. I imagine from the evening you've had, you'll have seen that Sirius and James are basically one person?" He laughed.

"Yeah, they remind me of the Weasley twins." Harry agreed.

"Well, James and Cassie, they are the complete opposites of each other in every way but they were each others balance. They are the other half of each other, Cassie has always been more cautious, harder to befriend, quick to temper, studious. She is also more prone to melancholy. Your dad, he was carefree, was friends with everyone, preferred to joke and laugh than to study. It always took more to anger James Potter than it ever did Cassie Potter. Your aunt would fly off the handle at the drop of a hat so you rarely took her temper to heart but if you dad lost his temper, you knew you'd gone too far. If James Potter was angry at you, you'd better run. It was a rarity to see."

"Um okay, I'm still not really sure that answers my question though."

"What I am trying to explain to you, is that your dad balanced out your aunt. If she was lost in her perceived misery and melancholy, he would be the one to pull her out of it. He was the sunshine to her moonlight. One needs the other. She has tried so desperately to get him to stay with her. She feels like she didn't fight hard enough Harry, she felts like she let him down. When she eventually managed her grief, Merlin, she fought with everything she had in her to get you. She thought that she could make it right if she had you, she owed it to James to raise you. When she kept failing at that, in her eyes, she felt like she was losing him all over again. If i know her like I think I do, if James has left her a letter, a letter I imagine where he says goodbye, says he trusts her and loves her, then she will be overcome with the same grief and guilt that has been drowning her for 13 years. She didn't get her goodbye Harry, she didn't get to make it right." he finished softly, hoping he had explained what he could.

"Oh. So, she can't face him. She's scared. I can help her. Thanks Regulus. I gotta go now."