Let's be honest

-20-

I hum and nod still trying to fully wake up.

"Why did you kidnap me though?"

He seems shocked by how calmly I ask my question as if I'm just being curious.

"You've got information Shield seems to require, on top of that you've got quite a bit to explain. I followed my big of the deal, the agent wasn't killed fulfil yours. Also explain whatever the meaning of your clothing is!"

Looking down I'm reminded of exactly what hoodie I'm wearing and have been for the last twelve hours, blush raised up my neck ears and cheeks making me look like a tomato.

"That-! I ugh..."

Fidgeting in pace trying to find a way to explain myself.

"I liked it so I bought it?"

It sounded more like I was asking him but I couldn't really say much more without compromising the future because of Thanos... Letting out a sight I simply say

"Can't really explain much more to you now, I promise I will...eventually when things calm down. Could you take me to the Stark tower when you attack?"

I see his expression harden and I have to stop myself from hugging him.

I feel my anxiety rise but not because of his actions but because of my own thoughts. What's happening to me? Yes I love to give hugs but only to very few people and if I started it, same goes for most if not all types of physical contact! Hell I get very nervous or even hungry if someone keeps trying to hold my hand to take me somewhere or rest their arm on my shoulder and let's be honest neither of those two actions should make anyone anxious normally...

Yet I've thought of hugging Loki or at least moving closer and leaning against him quite a few times already. And it's not like with the rest of the avengers whom I've thought of how it would feel like to hug them, with the others I THOUGHT about i didn't actually PLAN on eventually doing it... I would actually get quite nervous if you asked me to hug Tony or Thor and they're my second favorites!

I expected to want physical contact with all of them, I'm a big fan and physical contact is just a big way i like to express my emotions since I stumble with words when they're not planned. But I also knew I'd overthink everything far too much to be able to do anything...

I'm not overthinking right now! Well not about hugging him anyways. I just want to and feel like i should and the fact that it's coming so naturally is making me even more anxious!

Overthinking every single touch and being too scared to start anything, I can deal with.  I'm used to that, but this is different and I don't know how to react!

"Sorry I know I would get really annoyed if someone just went around acting like I currently am...but I can promise you if I had to choose between being on the avengers side or yours I'd still be here"