Why Stay When No one Cares?

Chapter 30: The Full Truth

(*Warning! Acts of self harm!*)

*Timeskip: 2 weeks later*

*Time: 2 pm*

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*Balloon's P.O.V*

Things have been great with Mepad around! Sure, it was a little weird, but we all managed!

Although, it may not seem like it; due to him being built with no emotions; Mepad is still curious about things. I'm sure Taco has noticed this as well....

He doesn't ask, but he's curious. Mepad is too kind like that, it's nice. Maybe we should tell him... Better now then later right?

Maybe I should ask Taco about it. Maybe once I finish making lunch. I'm making simple sandwiches today.

My insonmia has been a real pain these past few weeks. I've barely gotten sleep and I'm soo tired!

I don't know if the other two have noticed this or not. I'm actually pretty glad they haven't mentioned it.

I'm just finishing the sandwiches right now. Taco is playing with Ash and Mepad is on a walk. We did warn him about the cops being most active during the afternoon.

I hope Mepad is okay out there. He should be, he knows the outline of this place well. We all do, so it's kinda easy to walk past people.

Thinking about it, I don't think I've seen much of the people from the hotel. I see them sure, and Taco does too, but it's not as many people than before.

Did they all give up on me? Did they not care about me anymore? Do they all hate me more now for making them search for me? 

All these negative thoughts rushed through my mind. I could feel tears in my eyes, I try to wipe them away, but they kept forming.

I try not to make any noise while having this small mental breakdown. I can feel myself shaking, I was holding knife currently since I was cutting the chicken.

I stare at the knife then look at my arms. No. NO! I can't be doing this now! Not with Taco in the next room!

My mind wouldn't listen to me. I was on auto-pilot now as i place the knife on my tender skin. Damnit! I don't want to!

But my body just wouldn't budge. I had already made a cut. I start to make more cuts on my skin.

I was doing my best not to get any on the food, so I did this over the sink. I was shaking and doing my best not to make a noise.

I was so unfocused by everything around me. I don't know what was happening. My vision is blurry by the tears in my eyes, and I was hurting myself again.

I think I can hear something, but I'm not sure what it is. I can feel the knife being released from my hands. What?

I feel something on my shoulder, so I look up. My vision was still blurry, so I can't make out who this was. But I have an idea on who it might be.

I think she was trying to tell me something. But I couldn't hear her, my mind was tuning her out. She put her hand on my hand I think. 

Suddenly, I think we're moving. She's guiding me somewhere. She led me to a place, I think it's the restroom.