Always You

Chapter 18: Advice

A couple of weeks had passed and Ginny was still not talking to Malaya. Malaya got into a routine of spending her free time in Snape's old office, studying and hiding from Ginny. Malaya continued going to Quidditch practice, but Ginny would barely look at her. One time, Malaya knocked on Snape's door after class but no one answered. She pointed her wand at the doorknob. 

"Alohomora," she whispered. 

The door clicked open and she walked in, sat herself down in an armchair and got to studying. Snape walked in an hour later, cocking an eyebrow. 

"I hadn't realized I allowed you entrance when I wasn't around," he said coolly. 

Malaya smiled sheepishly. "I didn't know where else to go." 

"The library?" he offered as he sat behind his desk. 

"It's more peaceful here," she said. "I didn't go through your things or anything." 

"That's an odd thing for an innocent person to say," he remarked. He paused. "Are you ready to tell me why you aren't with your friends?" 

Malaya looked down at her textbook, not really seeing the page. Snape and her had a routine of sitting in comfortable silence for hours as they both worked, it was what she liked about being here. She didn't need to talk, didn't need to fill in the silence. 

"I just need some space," she finally said.

Snape gave her a look that told her he didn't believe her. 

Malaya sighed. "Ginny found out about Lucius and I. She's pissed." 

Snape looked at Malaya for a longtime, as if he was seeing right through her. "I am almost afraid to ask, but you refer to you and Lucius as if that means something." 

"That isn't a question," Malaya pointed out. 

"You're right, I don't want to know," Snape said dismissively and Malaya was grateful at how quickly he dropped it. "This may sound unfathomable considering how stubborn you are, but have you considered apologizing?" 

"I really appreciate how there is an insult in everything you say," Malaya said. 

"It's a gift." Snape almost smirked. 

"Why should I apologize? My relationships are none of her business. She should apologize for assuming that I'm a bad person because of who I... associate myself with." 

"That is a fair assumption on her part," Snape said and Malaya rolled her eyes. "Isn't it possible that she feels hurt because you lied to her? Maybe it has nothing to do with your... relationship." 

Malaya shut her textbook loudly. "I hate it when you make sense." 

"You must feel a lot of hate then," Snape remarked as Malaya stood, rolling her eyes again. "Where are you going?" 

"To apologize," Malaya answered. 

She grabbed her bag, stuffing her textbook inside, and threw it over one shoulder. 

"Does this mean I should no longer expect to find you hiding in here?" Snape asked.

Malaya turned to look at him. She looked around the office, making a show of her thought process. "Hmm, I kind of like it here." She looked back at her professor. "I think you're stuck with me, sir." 

Snape leaned back in his chair, gazing at her. "I will invest in better locks for my door, then." 

"Good luck keeping me out." 

"Is that a challenge?" 

Malaya smiled. "Bye, Professor. Oh, and thank you." 

Snape said nothing as Malaya scurried out of his office. 

Malaya found Ginny in the common room, talking in hushed tones with Neville. 

"Ginny," Malaya said, sitting across from her. 

Ginny had dirt on her cheek and Malaya assumed she was outside practicing for their upcoming match against Ravenclaw. "What?" 

Malaya looked Ginny in the eye, her heart flipping at how much she missed talking with her. Suddenly, all her confidence vanished, being replayed with anxiety. "I'm... really sorry." 

Ginny raised an eyebrow. "Okay. Is that all?" 

Malaya shook her head slowly. "I'm sorry I lied. That was a really shitty thing to do. I mean.. of course you can't trust me anymore. I'm sorry I made so many excuses for lying too. The fact is - I lied. And I shouldn't have." 

Ginny said nothing. 

Malaya looked down at her hands. "I was so afraid to come here and be alone. I think... I think I latched onto any relationship I could get. Lucius would never be my first pick, but he was one of the only people that I could talk freely too. Then I came here and you guys accepted me for me. I-" Malaya felt the tears that threatened to spill and she blinked them back. "I lost my sister during the summer before coming here. I was lost and I ran away from everything I knew. I couldn't be there anymore. When I met you guys, suddenly I wasn't lost anymore. I felt like I belonged. I'm so scared to lose that again, Ginny. I don't deserve your forgiveness but I'm asking for it anyway. I miss you." 

Ginny looked at Malaya for a long time before speaking. She rubbed the back of her neck. "You don't have to get all emotional on me." She smirked. 

Malaya let out a laugh unexpectedly. "Does that mean you forgive me?" 

"If you promise to shut up," Ginny said. "And if you promise not to lie again." 

"Deal," Malaya replied. 

Ginny's shoulders slumped. 

"Finally," Neville said. "I was so sick of hearing Ginny talk about you." 

Ginny pushed Neville. "Shut up!" 

Malaya watched them, elated to be friends again and annoyed that Snape was right. She promised herself that she would never tell him.