Misfortune

Chapter 40

"August."

I look into Angus's eyes hoping he was just joking but he's clearly not.

"August, you've gone pale. Sit down."

My breathing grows faster as I try to get pass Angus, but he blocks my way.

"Where are you going?" He raises his voice to me, which he never does.

"I have to find him; he has to be somewhere."

"Tell me, do you really think you'll find him?"

I stop struggling to get pass him as I give him a glare. 'What does he mean by that? I don't have time for this shit, I have to find James. '

"Angus move," I warn him.

He scoffs as he crosses his arms," Or what? Huh?"

"Just move, now!"

"He's gone August, leave it be. Why chase after someone who speaks rudely to you?"

He pushes me back some, I stumble as I try to keep my balance.

The veins in his arms bulge as he yells," Be for real right now August. James isn't someone you'd want to have in your life. I thought I could accept the two of you, what you are, what you built together but I can't. This is just ridiculous. He's a psychotic murderer and you need to leave while you have the chance."

I scrunch up my eyebrows," I don't need this, especially from you right now. You've been against him ever since day fucking one. You think I don't know that he's bad for me? I literally criticize myself every day for staying with him. Sure, he's a murderer, bad, a piece of shit at times, rude and cold but he's the only person whose ever truly made me happy to be alive. "

Angus's eyes widen some as he says," What about me? All the times I was there for you???"

"That's just it Angus, you were only there for me now. Not when I really needed you. I have James now and he makes me happy, more than I can think."

"Is that so?" He takes a step closer to me causing me to backup.

"Does he make you happy by putting his hands on you and forcing himself on you?"

My eyes widen in alert. I could feel my hands trembling as I looked to the ground." You think I don't see what's going on here? Yesterday was enough for me to know how he is with you behind closed doors. I thought the bruises around your neck was just the side effects of rough sex but then I saw how nervous you got when James walked in the house for dinner yesterday. You were scared shitless."

My hand subconsciously goes to my neck as the image of James strangling me crosses my mind.

Angus lets out a deep breath as he turns his head away from me," He told me about what you guys did to those two teenage boys a month ago."

My head shoots up as I look at him.

He still doesn't look at me. It's as if he's genuinely disappointed in me. "August how could you do something like that?" His voice cracked as he spoke.

"I didn't kill them, I promise. I only cleaned their blood stains off the wall," I plead with him as I take a step forward, reaching out my hand. He dodges my touch quickly," Do you hear yourself right now? You helped someone in a crime rather than calling the cops. So what you didn't kill them, you were still there when they died. You had a chance to do something, and you didn't. You're sitting here willingly deciding to live with a killer instead of coming home with me. This isn't the older brother I used to look up too."

I lower my trembling hands down to my side as I watch Angus's eyes fill up with tears.

He's right.

He's so right but there's still something in me that wants to be with James. It's like a calling I can't resist.