• Self Pt. 1 •

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C h a p t e r
T h i r t y - s i x

SHE had convinced herself that the loneliness hadn't begun creeping in already

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SHE had convinced herself that the loneliness hadn't begun creeping in already. Two weeks in her new apartment, fully furnished. It was meant to feel new, but it was the same old loneliness from her childhood. Trapped between four walls and everything looked so pretty but felt so wrong.

A deep sigh left her as she reached for the television remote. Wishing she could melt into the leather couch, become one with the perfect stitches holding fluffy cushioning inside. Those stitches had company amongst the other stitches.

Perhaps it wasn't loneliness, just silence. So she turned on the TV and a random old romcom was on. The Object of my Affection. Baby liked that movie. It made her cry and she always felt relieved after a good cry.

The movie played and she remained, unmoving in her spot as she watched it. By the end, she felt her eyes droop.

Sleep came easily.

♥️

“Did you find the noodles?”

“I don't think she bought noodles.”

“Who the hell doesn't have noodles in their house?”

“Fuck I don't know, people who don't want noodles?”

A yawn left Baby's lips as she forced her eyes open. The talking from the kitchen sounded familiar and her body moved on autopilot. She stretched her legs before shuffling into the kitchen.

“Hey sleepy.” Brielle greeted with a natural nonchalant wave that could only belong to her. Her red hair was piled up in messy bun that definitely looked messy.

Baby greeted softly as she walked over to Colin who was squatted down in front of one of the cupboards. She ruffled his hair in an affectionate gesture and reached up, opening the cupboard above and retrieving an unopened '4 in 1' pack of instant noodles.

Colin looked up and let out a dumbfounded oh seeing what he had been searching for in her hands. Brielle let out a 'he probably didn't look properly' and sent Colin a glare of disdain.

Baby smiled a little watching her friends act like they always did. Silly. And it was so comforting. Her smile faded as she thought of the cold seconds after they would leave, and the minutes and hours it would stretch into. They weren't here forever.

She had to face herself sometime soon.

♥️

Brielle tackled Colin after letting out a loud screech of disagreement. He had cheated during a game of snakes and ladders, skipping a snake or two until Baby innocently wondered aloud how well he was counting.

“You filthy cheater!” Brielle shouted down at the brunette laughing under her weight.

Colin apologized profusely and Brielle accepted half-heartedly.

Baby sat back in her spot on the floor and looked at the two for a moment. She saw more than she let on, like the way Colin stared at Brielle longingly, the little glances they shared between silent conversations. Signs of blooming romance. She felt like she was watching a romcom in real time.

It made her happy to see her friends finding love. Finding good things in a general sense. Their happiness was hers, even when she felt like her own world was crumbling beneath her.

♥️

Colin hugged her tight and dangled his copy of the spare key to her apartment in her face childishly, “Don't do anything funny in there, you never know when I might drop in.”

A punch was delivered to his side and Brielle pushed him aside to give Baby an even tighter hug, laying a gentle kiss on her cheek as she pulled away.

“Be safe, sleep well. Call me tomorrow so we can go out for lunch.”

A genuine smile overtook Baby's features, “You guys have a safe trip back, and I'll call you Bri. Love you both.”

"Love you too.”

Then they were gone, down the hallway and the sound of the elevator doors opening made Baby frown. She shut her apartment door and locked it. Bolted it up, placed her palm on it.

_______

[Partially Edited]

authors note: not me crying my eyes out at 11PM. Anywho, this is part 1 in Baby's 'Self-healing' journey. The rest of the story is kinda set apart from this.

Hope you enjoyed this. :-)

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