Chapter Sixty-Three

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December 4th 2023 -New York City - Mary-Kate's and Blue's Brownstone

"Is there somewhere private we can have a word?" The man in uniform spoke with little emotion in his voice or expression on his face. He reminded me of a robot. Did the military condition you that much it turned you into stone? "What is this regarding?" It was chilling how calm and collected she could come across when she needed to. She falls right back into her military ways without having to think about it. All emotion shuts off. "Task force I.F.17" He says. I look at Blue again recognising the code name. "We'll be in the office." She told me, she kissed my cheek. "This way." She led the man through our house upstairs to the office. His heavy boots make loud noises as they make contact with our hardwood floors. I was stuck on the spot. "Mary-Kate?" The door was closed for me. "What if it's Amos?" I asked the adults in front of me, feeling like a helpless child. "She can handle it."

I was sick and tired of people thinking she could handle the world on her shoulders. She's not invincible. She's my Bluebell. Sometimes I feel like I'm the only person who really knows her. Who knows she screams bloody murder when she sees a spider and doesn't stop until it's out of the building she is in. Or how she cries at disney films. How much her time in the military haunts her. How sensitive she is. Am I the only person who noticed the cracks? The only person who could see her breaking and being forced to make do with broken parts because it's what is expected of her. "Amos wouldn't leave her." Timothy said sure of it. "People don't always get a choice." I say looking him in the eyes.

We went back into the lounge to wait for Blue to come and tell us what was going on. My leg won't stop bouncing. I was terrified. She'd be crushed if her dad wasn't returning to her. I'd be heartbroken too. He was an amazing man and I couldn't imagine him not being at another family dinner. Or coming home and fixing his marriage. I couldn't imagine who Blue would be without him in her life.

The Jenson's wanted to stay to make sure Blue was okay. If it was Amos they knew as well as I did she wouldn't be so calm about things. She has the potential to be explosive. She has the potential to be self destructive. To make dumb choices because her heart is hurting. She's done it before and I'm sure she'd do it again given a big enough reason. Her last reason was Kacy.

"Thank you." I hear Blue say before the door latches shut. I stood up waiting for her to come into the lounge. She took a few moments before she came in. We all looked at her with anticipation. "Dad's fine." She told us with a soft smile. I let out the breath I had been holding in. "What was it about?" "We'll talk tonight." She assured me, pecking the top of my head and holding me into her side. The closest I've been to her since we were in my office earlier. "Okay." I said, nervous continued to bubble in the pit of my stomach only now it wasn't because I was scared someone I loved was dead. It was for a million different what if reasons.

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The Jenson's stayed a little longer. Probably to observe Blue and make sure she was actually okay. When they did leave, silence blanketed the house, we cleared away the kitchen, the only noise was the clattering of the dishes and the utensils.

"Blue, you're killing me! What happened?" I asked putting the last of our dishes away and turn to her. "I love you so much." She told me simply. "I know. And I love you too. But a guy turned up at our home and you were gone for an hour and I just... Please." I begged her I needed to know. She chewed at her lip nervously as she tried to find her next words.

She took my hand and sat me down on the Island stool. She kept hold of my hands as I looked up at her, I tried to work out what was going on. "Has someone gotten hurt? Is your Mami going back too?" "My Mami isn't going back. No." She says and the way she says it unsettles me. "What do you mean by that?" I asked her. She opened and closed her mouth a few times but she didn't need to say it. I knew from her lack of words and look of pity in her eyes. "You can't. You can't go back there!" I say the second I figured it out. "They need me." She says weakly. "No." I say firmly. "No. You're not going." I told her. It was not happening. There was no way she was going back there. "I have to." She replied with her eyes darting around the room."You don't have to. They can't force you. You were discharged! Injured! You're injured." Did she forget that part? Forget why she didn't have to finish her tour in the first place? "I got the medical clearance before we started dating MK." I shake my head. She would have told me. She would have gone back. If she had the chance she would have gone back. "Then you've been lying to them. Or you're lying to me!" I accused her. "You still get bad headaches. You have PTSD! You're not going back." She was being completely ridiculous. "If you got clearance you would have gone back." "MK I got my clearance." I shake my head. "Then why didn't you leave." Her face softened as she gazed into my eyes, I could melt under her amber eyes. "Because of you. Because I was falling for you." "So I was enough for you then but not now?" I asked, shrugging my shoulders not understanding her choices. She made no sense. Why let me in, let me fall for her just to leave? Was she that heartless? Had everything she had gone through ruined her completely that this was her idea of amusement. Having me begging her to stay. Scared that I may never see her again if she steps foot on that battlefield. "I wanted to give us a chance. You're enough Tiny." "Then stay!" She shook her head. "You're not going!" "I'm not asking for your permission." She sounded sorry when she said that. Tears built in her eyes as she choked on her words. "I didn't ask for my parents permission when I left. And I'm not asking for yours." "Blue you're not fit enough to go back!" Tears already poured down my cheeks as I gripped her hands. I couldn't believe this was actually happening. She was going to go back. Risk her life. Risk what we had, put herself through the most traumatic events she has ever been through all over again for the chance her brother is still alive? "I'm medically cleared to go back." "How!" I shouted at her. She tried to let go of my hand and with a little bit of a fight she won, but she didn't pull away, one hand remained in mine and I held it with both, whilst her others cupped my jaw and wiped the constant flow of tears off my cheek. "Tiny, I gotta go. They need my help. I'm going." She told me clearly.

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