Wrapped around your finger - Post Malone

2

Utah sucks. It's fucking hot and dusty and very very country. Salt Lake City was not so bad, but only when she stands under an ice-cold shower. Fucking hell. She swears all the way out of town and nearly dies from heat stroke. About twenty minutes out of the city her phone dies so now she has to old-school it without a fucking phone to guide her to this Cottonwood Ranch, which seems to be slap bang in the middle of fucking hell. She pulls off the road when she gets to a tiny town and walks into a small diner. It's full of cowboys, well that's a good sign. "Hi, can I help you?" the waitress from behind the counter asks. "Yes. I am looking for directions to Cottonwood Ranch please," she says. The waitress side-eyes the other waitress and then both frown at her. A few of the cowboys snort into their food. Rude. "Um...Austin Post? Does anyone know who that is?" Hazel asks. She hears a couple more snorts and then a platinum blond-headed woman with big tits and a pierced belly button swings around in her chair to face Hazel. "Yeah. I know Austin Post...he lives at Cottonwood Ranch," she says with a proud sly smile like she just got one over on Hazel. "Well that was helpful, thank you all so much," Hazel says sarcastically and walks out of the diner. Before she gets back to her car she hears the diner door swing open behind her. "Hey! Hey!" she hears someone shout from behind her. She turns to see the blond woman standing on the diner steps with her hands on her hips. "Austin does not like to be disturbed, especially by city folk. He is getting ready to move his cattle and he gets extra testy around this time so best you be on your way," blondie says. Hazel sighs and looks around, last thing she needs right now is a pissing competition with a woman she does not know over a man she has never met. "Thank you for the advice I have no intention of using. I am going to bank it in my  - I don't give a shit box," Hazel says. Another blond-haired girl steps out of the diner and laughs at Hazel's comment. "Pay no mind to  Jan, she has had a crush on Austin since the day we were born. Cottonwood Ranch is about fifteen miles out of town, just keep straight on this road. You will see the sign on your left," the new blondie says while Jan huffs next to her. "Thank you," Hazel says and opens her car door. It's hotter than satans balls so she opens all the doors and waits for it to cool down a little. "My name is Tina by the way and, just a heads up, Jan is not wrong about Austin being testy. The man was born a grump," Tina says. "Well it just so happens that is my favorite type of man," Hazel says closing all her doors and then climbing in. So far there has been nothing good about Utah. Fuck Utah.

Ten miles up the road and Hazel has to slam on her breaks. "What the fuck is this?!" she asks herself as she opens her car door and climbs out of the car. Standing on the fucking hot tar road she throws her arms up in the air and watches the millions of cattle walking leisurely across the road.  Looking into the field she can see there are millions more still to come. She will be here for hours. Fucking great. Surely this is illegal. Is it legal for cattle to walk on the road? She should google that, it's going to bug her now. Fuck, what is she supposed to do now?

"You are in the way. You are upsetting my girls."

Hazel spins around and comes face to face with a black horse. She slowly looks up and sees a man sitting on the back of the horse. A cowboy. "Well I am happy to get out of your way if you just stopped your cattle long enough for me to pass," she says. The cowboy looks at her while chewing slowly. He turns his head to look at his cattle then after what feels like hours he turns slowly back to Hazel. The man is clearly not in a hurry. "No," he says then spits whatever he was chewing out of his mouth. It lands near Hazel's feet. She looks over at it and then scrunches her nose and looks back up at the cowboy. "Is that...is that fucking chewing tabaco?" she asks. "It is," the cowboy says looking at her like she is stupid. "Well, that is disgusting. Do not do that again," Hazel insists, hands now on her hips. The cowboy looks at her with a stoney face while he chews slowly. Then he turns his head while keeping eye contact with her and spits again.

"Disgusting...look, can you just stop your cows so I can be on my way?"

"No."

"Well do you how long all this is going to take?"

"No."

"Ok, is there an alternative road I can use?"

"No."

"Do you have any helpful suggestions for me?"

"No."

Hazel can feel the sweat running down her back and her boob sweat is making her bra wire dig into her. The sun has also baked her face for the ten minutes she has been fighting with this arrogant ass cowboy. She reaches inside her top and unclasps her bra then pulls it out of her shirt. She lets out a satisfied groan as she is immediately more comfortable. The cowboy is looking at her with one eyebrow raised, still fucking chewing. "You could be a little more considerate. Other people need to use this road too, you know," she says waving her bra around as she talks without realizing it, when she does she tucks it under her arm. The Cowboy smirks at her. He is really handsome and stocky. She likes stocky men...he also has big hands, and she likes big hands. Hazel, no.

"Darlin', you came from the town. Everyone knows I am moving my girls today."

"Darling? My name is Hazel, thank you very much and-" Hazel says but stops short when she realizes what he said. Oh shit, is this Austin Post? Could not be, this cowboy looks like he has never taken a step off his ranch let alone come all the way to New York. This cowboy is tabaco chewing country deep. This cant be Austin Post. Before she can say anything a young girl comes riding up to them on a caramel-colored horse. She is pretty, she looks a little like Cathy did as a teen but she has bright blue eyes that match the cowboys. She can't be older than ten. This must be Austin and Cathy's daughter. "Hello, Miss," she greets Hazel then turns to the cowboy, "I did a head count and we are missing a calf. What do you want me to do, dad?" she asks. The cowboy looks at her and then spits out another piece of his chewing tobacco. "The calves are your responsibility, Evelyn. What do you think you should do?" he asks. "I think I should turn back and look for it, but that could take hours, dad," Evelyn says. "Yup. It could take all night," he looks up to the sky then back down to the young girl, "and it looks like it will rain so best you get moving," he says. Evelyn turns and gallops off without a word. Hazel looks up to the sky and sees not one single cloud in the blue sky. The cowboy is crazy and now he is looking at her again. "Evelyn? You named your daughter Evelyn?" Hazel asks before she can stop herself. The cowboy frowns at her, she has offended him. "You are named after a nut," he throws at her then turns around and trots off, ignoring Hazel as she calls after him.

Fuck, so much for a good first impression.