43 ◦ Life Or Death (RPOV)

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January 30th 2017

I was jolted awake by a loud thud next to me. I looked over to see Jacob's body on the ground.

"Jake! Are you okay?" I leaned over the edge on his side and reached out to him.

He was disoriented for a few seconds before grabbing my hand to calm me.

"Yeah?" he answered, like he wasn't sure.

"You... fell off the bed? What happened?"

"I'm not exactly sure."

He got up and sat next to me again.

"Did you have a bad dream or something?"

"I don't think I dreamed at all." He chuckled, then kissed my cheek. "I'm all right. I should probably get up anyway. I'll make you some breakfast."

"Hang on." I reached forward to grab his waistband, pulling him back down on the bed. "It's still dark out, silly. You're practically sleepwalking. You need your rest."

He sighed, his eyes closed again. "I'm not that bad."

I giggled. "You kind of are, but it's okay... What's got you so wired lately? You've barely been home."

He thought for a moment, then sat up to sit across from me. "I've been having these weird instincts."

"About what?"

"Whenever I'm around you, I feel this extra weight over me. More than just the Imprint."

I nodded slowly. "A bad weight?"

"That's the thing, I'm not really sure."

"Is that why you've been spending more time with Billy?"

"Yeah. That and, I mean... I kind of had this cognizance that I'm immortal. I don't want to waste my time with him."

For some reason, I'd never thought about that part of it. I guess I never wanted to. I'll have the majority of my family for eternity, but I will lose some eventually. Charlie, Sue, Billy, Rachel, Rebecca, and now Renée, too.

I laid down again. "Speaking of... I think we should talk about our future."

An impulsive smile spread across his face. "What about it?"

"Well, you know my internship is in Ligonier. Almost three thousand miles from Billy. If you don't want to go—"

"Hey." He leveled his eyes with mine. "He's not going anywhere anytime soon. I just meant I want to take the time to be with him more. Not be glued to his hip."

"I'm serious. This is your home, Jake. You love it here. I hate to be the reason you're leaving it. La Push, your dad, Rachel..."

Jacob's expression softened, and he tilted his head. "As long as I have you, I'm home." His voice came out in a whisper, but his tone was firm. He meant it.

He leaned down to kiss me. Soft at first, but it quickly intensified. It felt like our bodies were siphoning all of the heat from the room.

I pulled away to take a breath. "As much as I'd love to continue, I'm exhausted," I remarked somnolently.

Jake pecked the tip of my nose. "Sleep, love." He laid his heavy head on my stomach and let out a deep sigh.

After just a few seconds, he jolted back upright, his eyes wide and his breath still.

I matched his panic. "Jake?!" He wouldn't answer. "Jacob!" I rose to my knees and shook his shoulders. "What happened?"

He whispered so quietly, even I could barely hear him. "What was that?"

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