The Winds Bring with them Change (Volume 1)

22: Thoughts Plague Thee

He was sitting in the Liyue cliffs, figures standing over him.

"Alatus has grown."

The voice was deep, kind and he could have sworn he knew it from somewhere. Before he could ask the man if he knew him, there was another voice from behind him. He knew this voice as well, but instead of the pleasant feelings the other had invoked, this one brought only fear.

"He is only doing as I instructed. Bringing their guards down 'till he can kill them both."

No, that wasn't it, he wasn't...

Xiao would never do anything of the sort, maybe in his youth, but not now, and definitely not to them.

"Alatus would." The frightening voice sounded sure, sounded commanding. He buckled under the tone, falling through the rock he'd thought was solid only minutes before but was now dandelions in the breeze, floating as he fell.

He'd never hurt them.

Xiao couldn't...

Not...

Them...

He was awake again, his brow damp, and arms filled with two sleeping men. He had to get his breathing under control, the last thing he wanted was to bring them back into the suffering they currently had to endure. But he was also panicking now, the weight he'd found so much comfort in last night suffocating him. He was trapped, losing rationale quickly the longer he was under them.

Finally he simply dissipated, reappearing outside the doorway, in the fresh air. It was still suffocating, the way he felt in his youth, as if his lungs themselves were being restricted. But the adeptal powers radiated around him, in a way he couldn't feel normally but was hyperaware of right now.

His hands were shaky when he raked them through his hair, pulling it away from his face with a ribbon. He hadn't had a nightmare with them in it in what had felt like so long. It was almost pulling him back into his head, back into the fear he'd thought he escaped. He was hyperventilating now, short jerky breaths that caused tears to gather in his eyes and his fingers to scrape across each other.

Breathe in.

Breathe out.

Breathe in.

Breathe out.

No matter how he focused on his breathing, on stilling his tears and his shaking, it wouldn't stop. It just wouldn't stop. How had they found him here? Was he away from Morax' protection now? Had someone told them. They had died, but what if they were back. He couldn't go back to that hell.

Not again.

Never again.

His mask formed over his face, and he could feel his form beginning to weaken.

"Xiao?" The voice, though it sounded rough and unused was timid and careful. He knew it was Aether, but his body was turning before he could stop his reflexes. He knew he looked frightening at the look that was echoed back at him. Wide eyes, and hands at his sides harmless. Aether's hair was undone, wild in the unkempt way of a sick man.

"Xiao, it's okay, you're safe here." Xiao narrowed his eyes. He knew that he was safe here, his worry was that they were back. If they were back, then no one he loved was safe at all. His loved ones were a way to get to him, and that was a risk.

His breathing was slowing down now, his mind slowing in sync. Perhaps it was a bit of an overreaction. His Lord had guaranteed that they would never be back. If they ever became too much for him to handle, Xiao was sure he would be one of the first to know.

Aether's hand was on his arm, partially steadying himself, and partially to ground Xiao. He inclined his head, and Xiao nodded, following him back indoors. He was still shaking just slightly when they passed through the doors, but unlike earlier, Aether's weight was reassuring. His heart was still racing but he felt a lot better with his breathing and shaking. He helped the blonde over to the couch, easing him onto it as gently as he could with his shaking arms. Venti was still asleep on the other side, curled into himself.

He was beautiful with his hair splayed around him like this, lashes over his cheeks casting a gentle shadow. A throat clearing shocked Xiao into jumping, the voice having come from the door he'd just come in through. He'd seen the man before, in Inazuma, blocking the Archon's blade from reaching the traveler. Realistically, he owed this man his life in return for his heroism, however he was done with life debts.

"Hello, is Aether home? I'd heard from the Captain he went on a dangerous mission and never returned, so I thought..." His voice was smooth, calm, as if he'd seen many a storm come over his mind and let them all pass. Perhaps Xiao might learn to let the storm currently plaguing his own mind pass from him. The stranger placed a hand on his chest, bowing a little when he spoke again.

"My name is Kaedahara Kazuha, and I am the outlander's dear friend from Inazuma." The tone in his words was questioning, as if requesting Xiao's name in kind. He considered for a moment not offering it, but he was trying to understand mortals, and as he thought before, maybe there was something to be learned here.

"Xiao. Liyue." Ok, so maybe less making friends and more being civil, but he was working on it. Give him a break, it had been years since his last 'friendship.'

Kaedahara's hair was tied behind his head loosely, the red streak in it matching his eyes in vibrancy. He was lithe, the fingers that gripped a talisman of permission long and slender. The man was pretty, and based off the Anemo vision hanging at his hip, it was becoming very clear that Aether had a type.

When the silence seemed to reign, Xiao realized that he hadn't even answered the initial question.

"Aether is here, come in." At his words, a slight, friendly smile grew on his lips and he slipped his shoes off before entering the mansion. If Xiao had called him pretty before, perhaps he was beautiful now with the smile playing on his lips. However, though he could acknowledge his beauty, it didn't give him the same childish feeling of glee as Aether and Venti's.

Aether smiled tiredly up at him from his position under multiple blankets. That childish feeling in Xiao's stomach grew and he looked back up at Kaedahara.

"The healers said it was a concussion. Don't talk loudly, it hurts his head." The smile sent in his direction that time felt different, as if he had the knowledge of a secret Xiao didn't.

Now that Aether's friend was over, Venti decided it was a perfect time to wake up. He stretched wide, yawning until he noticed the new face occupying what was usually just their space.

"Ah~ Kazuha, come to visit our darling traveler?" He sauntered over to Xiao as he spoke, his footfalls barely detectable until his arms were around Xiao's neck. He placed a soft kiss to Xiao's mouth, and though normally Xiao would melt into the embrace, he stood frozen.

The looks on the blonde and white haired men's faces were basically indecipherable.