Harry and I had been texting but nothing had been the same since the day with Jess at his house. Something had changed in him that day and I didn't know what it was. He had been even more vague than he was before and he barely even talked to me. He didn't even look at me during class which was odd. It was almost like what happened with Jess had changed him into a completely different man.
I missed the talks I had with Harry before we hung out. It was flirtatious, fun, and in a weird way intelligent. He always made me think and knew exactly what to say but now our conversations were typical and boring. I knew I had to bring it up but I didn't want to ruin any chance I could have with him.
Daisy: Harrrrrryyyyy
Daddy Harry: What I'm a little busy.
Daisy: I'm sorry never mind.
Daisy: i just miss you.
Daddy Harry: Don't miss me.
Daisy: Why?
Daddy Harry: Just don't. I'm not worth the attention.
Daisy: Yes you are!! Why do you say that?
Daddy Harry: No reason.
Daisy: Talk to me. Are you okay.
Daddy Harry: I'm fine. Chill out!
Daisy: I'm sorry... I just want to help.
Daddy Harry: You can help and leave me the fuck alone.
Daisy: wow
Daisy: Really?
Daisy: You've been acting so cold since the whole thing with Jess. Why?
Daddy Harry: I don't know because it was weird and I'm pissed at you and I just want to move on from it all.
Daisy: Pissed at me????
Daddy Harry: Yes you.
Daddy Harry: You overreacted and I realized you're just a little girl and I cant be apart of the little girl drama you have. You are naive and childish and I hate that about you. You're life is so boring and repetitive that you have to start pointless drama to make yourself happy. I know what high school girls are like.
Daisy: You don't mean that.
Harry: Oh but I do little one. I can get any girl I want and I don't need to be lusting after some teenage girl.
I ignored the texts after that. I could not believe that he would say those things to me. I wanted to hate him so badly but the feelings I had developed for him stopped me from going any farther. He was being so rude and uncalled for and I didn't understand. This was the Harry I didn't know and now that I had seen it I didn't know what to know it.
I wanted an explanation for everything. Harry confused me beyond belief. He was more almost as conflicted with his emotions as a teenage girl. One minute he told me he wanted to be with me and showered me with compliments and the next he was mad and would make any excuse to argue with me.
It was late so I started getting snuggled into bed. I put on my pajamas and started reading my endless twitter timeline. I wanted to get over Harry. I wanted to turn all the feelings I had for him into something negative and fall for someone else. I was stupid to think he wanted me but I couldn't stop thinking of him. We had one good memory together and it of course had to be my first sexual experience. As much as I hated to admit it that was something that would stick with me for a long time.
It wasn't like he took my virginity but it still meant something to me. I trusted Harry enough in that moment to let my walls down. I let him touch me and I didn't regret the experience. It felt good and I would do it again if I could. I'm sure that sexual experience meant nothing to Harry. That was the thought that broke my heart. I felt like it was such a big deal to let someone love me like that and I'm sure he thought nothing of it.
As I drifted off to sleep I thought about Harry. I wonder why he snapped tonight of all nights and I wonder what he was doing tonight. Now that he was "over" me I bet he was with another girl loving her the way I wanted him to love me.
-Harry-
I loved alcohol sometimes. I loved to drink and let loose. I needed it especially after being around the loud students all week. So when I was actually got on campus I would go to the frat houses and just drink. I would play their stupid drinking games and hook up with any girl. It felt good and that's what I had done tonight before I met up with heather.
"Harry come cuddle with me", Heather whined from the random bed in the frat house and I rolled my eyes at how needy she was. I could barely handle her annoying behavior when I was sober but when I was drunk it was a little more tolerable. She had been my go to hook up since high school and she was still my go to hook up.
She was nothing special though really. She had an average body with average assets. Her hair was chestnut brown and her eyes were the same shade of brown. She was popular in high school, a mean girl but the sorority girls didn't accept her and she soon became a nobody. She had such high expectations for her college career that didn't end up working out.
"Coming", I yelled pulling my phone out of my pocket and taking a quick drag from my cigarette. I had a few texts from Daisy. I would much rather be fucking her but she was clinging to me right now and my sober mind wouldn't mind but the alcohol wouldn't allow it.
I sent her a few angry texts before stomping out my cigarette and laying with Heather.
"Is this going to be a regular thing now?"
"What do you think?", i snapped," No."
" Why harry? You and I have always had such great sex", she whined and I rolled my eyes. This was what Heather had always done the past few times we fucked. She wanted our casual fuck to turn into something more and I hated that. I had Jess during those times and now I had Daisy. I preferred Jess and Daisy over Heather any day.
"You're boring, Heather", I shouted and she shot up and disgusted look on her face.
"You don't mean that, Harry", she was offended and I fucked up but I hated her right now and I didn't want to be around her anymore.
" I do mean it. The sex I have with you is the most boring thing on the planet. You're just an easy fuck."
She stared at me for a while expecting an apology or for me to roughly kiss her for round two. The silence made the situation even more annoying so I got out of the bed and grabbed the bottle of whiskey, taking a long drink from it.
"Are you going to leave?" I screamed at her and tears slid down her cheeks her button nose turning red," Fine. I'll go."
I quickly put on my clothes after she left the bedroom and got ready to leave. I wanted to drive back to my place but I knew I couldn't considering how drunk I was. I played around on my phone for a while but social media was only entertaining for so long.
Harry: Daaaiisssyyy... I want to fuck you.
Harry: I miss you a lot.
Love the way you lie// Eminem ft. Rihanna
Deja Vu// Eminem
