Bound

Chapter 27 - Virgin

Skylar

Elanor. The name rings in my head as I lean back, staring at Dmitri.

"Elanor. Your girlfriend," I state rather than ask him.

"Not quite. We don't really use that term in werewolf circles. What she is...is not my chosen," Dmitri says, staring at me emotionlessly.

"But you sleep with her and bring her as your plus one to major events like this one." I am trying to get my point across. I assume he sleeps with her, his evasiveness prodding me for confirmation by stating it as a fact he can deny. I really hope he denies it. My heart has dropped to the bottom of my stomach as I wait for his answer.

"Exactly. She is there to play that part when needed and vice versa. We have that arrangement. Living as long as we do, it makes sense to have someone to do these things with."

I'm not sure why, but I feel like vomiting. The fact that there is someone in his life, someone he is sleeping with and goes to events with like normal couples do, disturbs me. I feel jealous. And really hurt.

"Do you love her?" I'm holding my breath, waiting for his answer.

"I'm not sure. I haven't really thought about it."

Tears start pricking the back of my eyes, threatening to spill out.

"I need to shower," I say quietly, getting up and heading to the bathroom just as tears start falling from my eyes.

I don't understand my feelings. I feel heartbroken. Heartbroken about something that I have no right to be. I close the door behind me, quickly putting the shower on so that Dmitri cannot hear the sob that escapes my lips. I want to be special to him. I want to be with him. Fuck it, I'm busy falling for this guy, more tears streaming down my face at the realization. No, no. Not happening, I say to myself, getting up off the floor that I sat on as this breakdown started. I vigorously take my clothes off, throwing them in the wash basket forcefully, nearly knocking it over.

My shower is quick and determined. I will not let this happen—no falling for this guy. No ways. I could stop these feelings, even crush them. There was no way I would fall for a guy like this. A Lycan who lived for decades and had a girlfriend he denied is precisely that, who gives me the best orgasms of my life. Yip, not happening.

After drying myself off, I stand in the walk-in closet, wondering what to wear. I chose a red and brown bohemian dress, with an elasticated waist and sleeves. It comes to just under my knees. I pair this with brown ankle boots. I swap out the leather strap bracelets, which need to dry as I forgot to take them off in my haste to shower and replace them with various brightly colored beaded bracelets. I put on my black obsidian necklace. Maybe subconsciously hoping it will ward off further feelings developing, from my side, towards Dmitri.

Shaking my hair out, I decide to leave it loose. I look at myself in the mirror, feeling good. I need to be strong and just keep Dmitri at a distance. He mustn't know how I feel. I take a deep breath and release it before leaving the closet. Dmitri is still sitting at the table, sipping on a fresh cup of coffee.

"You okay?" he asks, looking at me as he takes in my appearance. He continually asked this as if I were a fragile being. I suppose, as humans, we are. His eyes darken as he skims my face, down my torso, all the way to my feet before meeting my gaze again.

"Fine," I say cheerily as I walk over and pour myself another coffee. I join him at the table. 

"Okay, so...what happened early this morning definitely cannot happen again, considering what you have just told me. Agreed?" I try to sound jovial as I say this, not wanting him to understand how I really feel about the situation and him.

"About last night," he says, not acknowledging agreement to my statement, "you behaved pretty oddly after your orgasm...and mine." His eyes are glued to mine. "Does this have anything to do with you being a virgin?"

Heat erupts from my cheeks, a blush in full force. "I'm not a virgin," I say, eyes big, lying straight to his face.

"You are. I can smell it. And the way you blush. You're too innocent. You forget I am a Lycan. I can tell when someone is lying," he gestures to me. "You don't lie well. Your heartbeat, the way you are swallowing and the fidgeting, gives you away."

I don't really know what to say to that. I'm caught out, so is denying it really the route to go? "You can smell I'm a virgin," I say incredulously. "And what exactly does a virgin smell like?"

"You have an almost indistinguishable rose scent lingering on your form. Humans can't smell it, and only trained or highly sensitive species, such as myself, can identify it."

"I can't see it on me," I murmur, more to myself, as I lift my arm, still only seeing the autumn leaf brown, faint pastel yellow, and apple green, joined together by my unique marker. I don't see rose on me. That scent is generally pink but varies according to the type of rose.

"See it?" he asks curiously.

"Nothing," I say, dropping my arm on the table. That's a story for another day. 

"So, yes, I'm still a virgin." I look back at him expressionlessly, while inside, I'm cringing.

"Look, it's not by choice. I've been close twice before, first with Bobby when I was eighteen," I continue rambling, shifting in my seat from embarrassment. "We were fooling around at his parent's place, and he was going down on me. I had an orgasm, and the next minute, he was passed out. It was so fucking embarrassing. I thought it was from the beer he drank before we started, you know, or maybe he didn't get enough air while he was down there," I chuckle, trying to make light of this situation.

"Anyway, he didn't wake up for fifteen hours. Imagine trying to explain the situation to his parents. He was in the hospital, and the doctors said it looked like he was in a coma. Anyway, that story spread around the town I was living in like wildfire. You can just imagine what stories kids make up. Some were nice, like 'her vaginas so good it sent him to an early grave,' but others were not nice, 'it smelt so bad he passed out.' People are mean. My aunt, uncle and I moved because of the situation. It just put me off being intimate with anyone for a long time. Very long time."

"The next time I tried was when I was twenty-five. I had a boyfriend, Daryl. We had been going out for six months, me trying to avoid the whole intimacy thing until I eventually felt like I couldn't anymore. And part of me didn't want to. I want to have someone touch my body, pleasure them, have them pleasure me. It's not like I don't have sexual feelings," frustration coats my tone as I throw my hands up in the air. "Anyway, he was doing what you were doing to me last night-"

"Not like I was doing," Dmitri interrupts, a small growl at the end of his sentence. He is looking mad. "Don't compare me to him or anyone before," anger clear in his tone.

"Okay, you know what I mean. He was pleasuring me with his fingers," I say exasperatedly, looking at him to see if my rephrase calmed him down or not. Not. Men and their egos.

"When I climaxed, he slumped down next to me, unconscious. He was out for eighteen hours. Just like with Bobby, it looked like Daryl was in a coma. At that point, I realized it must be me. Long story short, we broke up. I swore off being intimate. Moved far away where no one knew me. And here we are."

There is a long pause before Dmitri finally says anything. "Firstly, let's just clear one thing up. There is nothing wrong with the way you smell. If I could bottle the scent you have going on down there when you are aroused, I would. It's intoxicating." His eyes turn black as he speaks, a huskiness coating every word. My cheeks are on fire, but a larger part of me relishes that my arousal turns him on so much.

"Secondly, have you seen a doctor about this?" Dmitri continues, his eyes changing back to their usual color. I use normal loosely.

"Well, Dmitri, what exactly was I going to say? 'Oh, hey doc, so every time I orgasm, my partner hits comaville, what do you think the issue is?' Not happening," I say sarcastically.

"Did you not think the same thing could happen to me, Skylar?" His words cause the blood to drain from my face.

Please don't forget to comment and vote!