One Direction One Shots (REQUESTS ON HOLD)

Loss (Zayn)

"Good-bye, I love you" She whispered as she closed her eyes for the last time. My girlfriend had just lost her battle with pancreatic cancer. "I love you" I whispered, pressing my lips to her still forehead.

I walked out of that room, in shock. The boys rushed up to me, she had been like a sister to them. "How is she?" Liam asked. I gulped. "She's gone" I heard gasps. "Zayn, what do you mean gone, liked moved?" Louis questioned hurridly. I shook my head as tears began to fall down my face. "Oh god" Harry muttered, putting his arm around me. They together helped me to the car.

I was in shock for weeks, until Liam finally dragged me out to an interview. No-one knew why I hadn't been seen in public for a while, and taht was how it was going to stay. But as we sat on that couch, the interviewer firing questions at us, she asked the one question I didn't want to answer. "So lads, who is single?" Niall and Harry put their hands up. I shakily put mine up as well, hoping no-one would notice. Sadly, the interviewer zeroed in on my hand. "Ahhh, Zayn, is this why no-one has seen you around lately, did you and Ally break up?" I shook my head. "Did you dump her?" I shook my head again, tears beginning to fall. I felt an arm go around me. "Did she dump you?" At this point I snapped. I stood up. "She's dead, she's f*cking dead" I yelled before storming off stage.

I got to the dressing room, and locked the door behind me. I could hear the lads knocking on the door, then starting to pound as I didn't answer. I couldn't live without her.

I walked to the cupboards, grabbing the bottle of painkillers. I poured them all out into my hand. I got a glass of water and hurridly swallowing them. I'll see you soon Ally, was my last thought. I closed my eyes, letting the darkness envelope me. Just as my eyes closed I saw the door burst open, and felt a hand catch my falling head.

I woke in a world of light. But nothing was as bright as the angel in front of me. She looked just how she had when we first met, not how she had when the cancer had ravaged her body. The long blonde locks hanging just above her waist, those emerald eyes that seemed to stare into my soul. The perfect pink lips, the ones I loved to kiss. Then the voice of angels spoke out, "Oh, Zayn"

I flew into her arms, feeling her arms once more around me. "Oh, Ally, I missed you" She smiled weakly. "Zayn, you need to go back" I shook my head, "I can't live without you". "Zayn, if you let go now, those who love you will be ruined, you have so many who need you, who love you, let me show you, what would happen"

The whiteness dissolved and I was instead in Harry's bedroom at his mothers house. Ally stood beside me, hand entertwined with mine. Harry was on the bed. He was just staring at the ceiling. My first thought was so what? He was fine, but then I looked closer. His culs were limp, there was no twinkle left in his eyes, and he looked like he hadn't eaten in weeks. "He just can't conceive the idea of functioning without one of his best mates" Ally said.

The scene dissovled and we were in a bar, somewhere. There was loud music playing, and Ally led me to the bar. There was Liam, sitting there alone. He stared at the barman, "Another" he barked. The guy frowned but poured another full tumbler of whiskey, which Liam downed in one. The drinks kept coming and coming until he passed out. The barman sighed and picked up Liam's limp body. We followed as the guy carried him up some stairs and into a bare bedroom, dumping Liam on the bed. "There hasn't been a night when Liam hasn't gotten drunk and passed out since you died. He is going into kidney failure, and dosen't care, he just wants to forget the pain"

The next scene was of Louis. He was sitting in a park, one we used to frequent when we were on X-factor. I watched him sitting there, ignoring everyone who came up to him. Then one small girl, around 12, came up to him. "I'm very sorry about what happened to Zayn, he seemed so nice" And with that small comment, Louis broke down. The girl backed away, as Louis sat there with sobs racking his body. Ally spoke once more, "Louis hasn't smiled since you left, he hasn't cracked a joke, he can only feel pain"

The scene dissolved once more, revealing a hospital room. In the bed lay a limp figure, one that I recognised as Niall. His wrists were restrained to the bed, and he was pale, much too pale. I went closer and saw the cuts that dotted his wrists. "He cuts to drown out the pain, focusing on the physical, rather than the mental. This is the third time he has been hospitalised for blood loss, the second time he has cut deep, trying to kill himself"

She turned my attention to the tv in the corner of the room, which was playing the news. I was shocked when my face came up. "And also today, is the one year anniversary of the death of boyband member, Zayn Malik. Zayn was a part of the popular boyband One Direction, who broke up shortly after his death. The other members of the band seem to have fallen apart in the aftermath of this tragedy. Zayn, after his girlfriend died of pancreatic cancer, killed himself with an overdose"

I had caused this, this was my fault. The scene dissolved, the whiteness coming back. Ally turned to me, and I was shocked to find tears running down my face. "You have to go back Zayn, for them, for your family" I nodded. She smiled and leaned in for one last kiss, it was so much more special, worth so much more than any of the others. "Goodbye Zayn, I mean it this time, I don't want to see you for a looooong time" I nodded, and the scene dissolved for the final time.

When I opened my eyes I thought I was still there, still in the whiteness, but then I felt the bed under me, and knew I was in a hospital. I turned my head to see four chairs next to the bed, all occupied by the lads, all of them asleep. I smiled, knowing I had to stay here, for them. They were my family, as much as any of my bioogical family was. 

I heard Liam groan, stretching his arms above his head. "My back hurts" He muttered. I couldn't help cracking a joke, "Yea, sleeping in a chair will do that to you" His head whipped around. "Zayn?" He said my name as a question and I nodded. He grinned, his arms flying around me in a massive hug. "Hey Li, what are you doing?" Came a sleepy voice, one with an irish accent. Liam back up a bit, just enough for the blonde boy behind him to see my grin. "Zayn" Niall yelped before joining in the hug. Soon the other boys woke up and joined in.

I loved Ally, and losing her still hurt, but I couldn't lose these guys too, they meant too much to me.