The love letter and the suicide note

22 days until suicide

"Bear Cub, I don't know what happened last night, but I really think you should talk to me about it. Maybe talking will help. I want to help you."

"I'm sorry."

Orson had been apologizing about that the whole phone call. He had nothing to apologize for. She knew what happened was not his fault, but no matter what she said, he wouldn't stop apologizing.

It's like he believed with all his heart that it really was his fault.

"Please stop apologizing, I told you that it wasn't your fault." Astra sighed. "Next time you can come to my place, but only if that will make things better."

"You can't see me anymore."

"What?" Astra's heart dropped.

"I don't want to see you anymore. I don't want to hurt you."

"You're not going to hurt me, believe me, I've been through shit before. Not seeing you will hurt me. You said I could help you. You said I could show you my favorite places and make you stay."

"I didn't promise though."

"Come on Bear Cub, let me help you like you said I could. I know I can save you, please believe in me. Don't give up on me."

Orson was quiet for a few seconds, but then he spoke up.

"I don't want to hurt you."

"You won't. Let me plan a fun day for us for this week. You meet up with me every day of this week and each day I'll show you one of my favorite places to go and favorite things to do. Each day will be different things, but they'll all lead to the last day. The last day will be the best."

Astra had a lot of things in mind that she thought he'd enjoy, he just had to agree to it.

She held her breath as she waited for him to answer.

"Alright, but only if... ow! Don't scream in my ear, that hurt."

"I'm sorry, I'm just excited. You're going to have so much fun this week, I promise. I already know what we're doing tomorrow." Astra squealed at the thought. "We should have a certain place that we always meet at and then I can take you away to my favorite places."

"What about Lake Toho? Since that was where we first met?"

"That's brilliant!" Astra couldn't stop smiling as she wrote her plans for the week down on her calendar in sparkly pink pen.

She was excited.

"I have a feeling this week is going to be awful." Orson said.

"Aw, don't be like that. It'll be fun. I do fun things, I'm nowhere near boring, and I already know what we're going to do tomorrow."

"I'm going to regret agreeing to let you do this."

"Meet me at the lake at exactly 6:30am."

"Now I have to get up really early?!"

"You're going to love it."