Riordanverse Oneshots, Rants and More

Rant #6- why fierrochase is everything solangelo wants to be

okay, I feel like this book is just gonna turn into me either ranting about stuff I like in the books or criticizing rick's writing. or both. I guess you'll have to bear with me now until I figure out how to continue that one oneshot about the seven using the ouija board that's been in my drafts since forever because I can't figure out how to write hazel. (question, would a sleep-deprived hazel ever say shit like "Greetings, plebians" and then launch into a speech like she's the host in a game show or is that ooc. be honest, I need genuine help)

IMPORTANT NOTE: I'm not anti-solangelo, nor do I hate it. I just think it could have done better, had rick had some more time to actually think about what he was writing.

(mark oshiro, I am begging you to save the solangelo novel. please you are our only beacon of hope.)

I won't be talking about the fanon version of solangelo that fetishizes and infantilizes them and makes them some jaw-dropping levels of toxic, by the way. Instead, I'll focus on their canon representation as well the well-written fanon version of them.

(i will probably get cancelled for this now.)

I'd be lying to myself if I said that solangelo didn't feel like the gay ship for the straights.

apparently, this streetlamp thought it'd be a great idea to flirt with that hot goth guy who kept leaving the camp and probably saved the world a few times by telling him about how he delivered a half-goat baby. which is, obviously, the peak of romance in his eyes.

honestly, good for him. I would have never had that much confidence.

it's kinda funny how will was just Some Guy in nico's pov that he'd heard about like once or twice at most because he was the designated hot blonde head healer at camp. since rick has a thing for blonde healers, apparently.

(minus, like, pranjal maybe. but I can bet that he would have been made blonde too had he not been based after rick's friend's son.)

but anyway, nico, who had just been forcefully (and violently) outed by the god of carnal love, and never given a moment to process how wrong that was of anyone to do to a person, was instantly required to get over his trauma of being outed and be in a relationship within a span of six months to show that he was, in fact, gay (and probably to spite all the percico (and jasico, valdangelo, reynico etc.) fans).

(not that it stopped them though. those guys have been in denial since like, 2014. the sheer willpower to just put on earphones and "LA-LA-LA I CAN'T HEAR YOU" their way through the entirety of trials of apollo as well as the announcement of the unnamed solangelo novel for a ship between two dudes with a four year age gap is almost commendable. almost.)(again, I'm not hating on the percico shippers, I just personally find that ship icky)

now I'm not saying rick made nico gay for the money or attention or anything. he definitely didn't. he obviously didn't think of nico's sexuality much at first, though, but over time it just clicked for him or whatever. and it helped at least 90% of the fandom, along with the introduction of alex fierro, to realise that they may not be straight/cis/etc. after all. which is, again, a good thing. a great thing, even.

wILLIAM, HOWEVER-

the dude just had to come in with his lowkey ableist dialogues. I'm sure it wasn't intended that way but still, that doesn't make it any less offensive.

even if you might not know exactly what that emo guy has been through, william, he's dying. and he's obviously been through some shit because he's a demigod and he just came back carrying the entire athena parthenos. at least have the decency not to blame him for running away because the camp didn't like him (which they actually didn't; it was NOT in nico's head or whatever). just because you were probably busy making heart eyes at him doesn't mean you would be blind to how the rest of the camp treated him after the celebrations died ever since he found solace (that pun was not intended I swear) in a complete black and white aesthetic and started raising skeletons and zombie chauffeurs out of the literal ground while being anti-social as a trauma response.