This Time

|21| IKA-DALAWAMPU'T ISANG KABANATA

— AIDEN —

"Just sit tight, Aiden. I'll take care of you."

My eyes closed involuntarily as I could feel my heart beating faster than ever. I could feel how close her lips are against mine and a single movement would make them touch.

But as I closed my eyes, my mind pictured dark brown eyes instead of hazel ones. I saw curly dark hair and red lips. I saw the face of the woman I've been craving for.

I saw the face of the woman I have feelings for. And as stupid as it sounds, being with Vera in this position made me feel like I'm cheating on Professor Peterson.

Abruptly, I stood up before our lips could meet. I held Vera's waist to prevent her from falling before I gathered my things as quickly as I can.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Vera touched my arm lightly, making me face her. "I'm sorry, was I too forward?"

"N-No, I just...I–" I don't know what to say.

"Okay, I may have moved too fast." She chuckled awkwardly. "Look, I don't know if you've noticed but I'm attracted to you. I think you're a really great person and you're just... you make me feel special. I like you, Aiden. A lot."

"You like me?" I asked bewildered. Me? Aiden? Someone like Vera likes me? Seriously? "Why?"

"Do I really have to elaborate how much of an amazing person you are?" Vera blushed, looking down at her hands. "I know I said I wanted to be friends, but I-I realized that I have feelings for you. And if you'll take me, I... I want to ask you out on a date. Like an actual date."

I watched as her hand moved everywhere, as if trying to explain what she wants to convey with her hand movements.

"Not a friendly date?" I questioned dumbly. Vera's cheeks reddened even more as she nodded. "Oh."

Someone likes me. The romantic kind of like.

A nervous chuckle came out of her mouth. "Is that a good 'oh' or a bad one?"

"I... I honestly don't know what to say," I said with utmost sincerity. "I've never," I gestured the two of us. "experienced this."

"Getting a confession?" I nodded shyly. "Well, you could think about it first. I'm not pressuring you or anything, take some time to think."

Do I really need some time?

I already know where my heart lies. The feelings between Professor Peterson and I may not be mutual, I still have existing and growing admiration for the older woman. It is something I don't think I have control of.

Even though I found Vera with absolutely no doubt attractive and fun to be with, I don't see myself being in a romantic relationship with her. Making Vera wait despite knowing the answer already would just make her think she has a chance to begin with. So I should just be honest, right?

"I-I don't like you that way."

It's better to do it earlier, right?

"I'm really sorry, but I just see you as a friend. I just...sorry."

To my surprise, Vera only smiled. Although it wasn't the same smile I was used to. It wasn't playful or happy. "I know."

"Oh."

"Yeah." She let out a breath. "But I still wanted to give it a try, you know? In case I may have a tiny bit of chance. Don't worry about it though, I totally respect that and thank you for being honest with me."

"I'm really sorry, Vera." My lips formed an involuntary pout as I tapped my foot against the floor.

"Aw, babe, don't be!" Vera pulled me down for a hug. "You're going to make me sad if you pout like that. In all seriousness, no hard feelings, you hear me?"