Brelione//DruigxOC

sharing the end of the world

i miss his touch, how he'd hold me and tell me how i was enough, how i was such a brilliant existence that he couldn't imagine a world without me. i miss the time in which i was not a monster, when i could roam freely without a follower behind me to ensure the safety of others. i miss how i could exist without fear of not knowing. now i am here, simply left as wasted potential.

of course life can only go so well for so long, the draining of myself leaving me as a broken piece trying to rebuild. the others do the best they can to help build me up, softening their voices and inviting me out to remind me i still have freedom. that the only one holding me back is myself. his hand closes around mine, something i wouldn't allow until two weeks ago.

when i was sure that i wouldn't burn under his touch, when i was sure that i wouldn't be dragged into the unknown everytime i shut my eyes. when i was sure that i wouldn't give into what my body begged for, to hurt him, to yell when i am not capable. it's something that could only happen in some hell like punishment, to have the overwhelming urge to hurt someone i love so dearly. for reasons that did not exist, my body and thoughts completely out of my control when i was nothing by a bystander in my own life.

for weeks i couldn't stand his touch, how warm it was, how it frustrated me. the anxiety i felt when he wanted to hug me. the way it angered me so much to be so close to him, how upset that i was for wanting it so bad. my mind breaking and repairing itself so many times that i couldn't tell which thoughts were mine and which were planted. i didn't want to reject him, to upset him and myself. but he is druig, my druig.

he's soft and delicate and sweet, telling me to let him know when i was comfortable again. that he would not be angry if i chose not to speak to him for sometime, if i needed to be alone or be with makkari or just isolate myself completely. it wasn't until today that i was finally ready again, ready to be hugged and held and covered in kisses. to have my shoulders wrapped around by his strong arms, his nose brushing against my ear as he whispers little dramas and comments into my air with a smile tugging at his lips.

and now that we can see eachother again, really see eachother, it's almost like nothing had changed at all. the look in his eyes could feel anyone into believing that nothing has changed, that we are still two fools in love with no understanding of much but eachother.

that is one thing that i am sure will always be here, no matter the year or place or how crazy i become. "would you like to go on a walk with me? ikaris is staring daggers."he whispers, dimples showing as he smiles. they're light and shallow but still there, just deep enough that if i reach out my fingers i can rest my fingertip just right.

i look passed him, seeing ikaris sitting with his elbows on his knees, leaned over them as he stares at us. maybe not at us, maybe past us or around us. oh, who am i fooling? of course he's looking at us. maybe he believed that druig and i were no more, that the relationship that had gone on for centuries had finally died as everything else does. i know that he's waiting for that day, waiting patiently for some centuries to pass when druig and i can't stand eachother. he will be waiting forever.

i nod to him, letting him pull me close to him. it still feels odd, being so close to him when he has no fear whatsoever. it seems i've absorbed it, worried enough for the two of us combined. worried about life, the future, the past, the present. everything.

the look that is captured within thenas eyes tells me that she is too, she looks terrified, almost ill. and that is nothing but terrifying. i wonder if every time she looks at me she is prepared to let a spear come into existence, just in case i do attack. and gil tries to act secure, confident, completely calm whenever i am in the kitchen but his shoulders say it all. he lets them fall casually most of the time, rested and unbothered.