Stealth. (FtM Karl)

Don't overthink it

"What the honk????" I cussed, sitting on my bed with my head in my hands.
Just thinking about the previous events would make my face completely red and I would smile uncontrollably.

Sapnap left not long after Wilbur, Tommy and Techno returned home.
It's been a few hours and I've heard nothing from him, no messages, no calls. The only thing he had said since then was "bye" as he left.
But it was only a few hours ago, like I said, so maybe he's just also reacting like I am? I mean, I'm the one who initiated the kiss.
Shit. Did he even want to? I mean, that's the message I was getting.
Ahhh what if he didn't want to??? What if I completely misread the whole thing.
What if I've ruined everything?
What if he doesn't want to talk to me now?
What if he tells someone?
Oh god, he's popular, what if he tells EVERYONE?
What if he tells everyone I'm a bad kisser?
Am I a bad kisser?? I DONT KNOW.

By this point, my leg was bouncing at extraordinary rates and I could feel my breathing start to feel heavy and out of sync in a way. My whole body felt panicked, fight or flight I suppose, but I can't fight nor run away from the current predicament I had gotten myself into.

'What if' I repeated, trying to calm down, 'it's all just what if, Karl.' I reminded myself, taking a deep breath.
"Everything will be fine..."

...but what if-
'No. Nope. No more 'what if's. We are going to distract ourself.'

There was so point in assuming 'what if's if I didn't even regret it. I just assume that I will regret. But as of now, right here, in this moment, before anything bad happens, right now I don't regret any of it.
And I would do it again.

"Right." I started, "I am going to go downstairs, and I am going to socialise, and I am going to forget the whole thing for a bit before I do anything stupid." I announced.
But no matter how many times I told myself that, I didn't move and I couldn't stop thinking.

"Come on, Karl. It's rude to stay in your room, these people have let you stay in their home, you can't just hide in here forever." I glared at the ceiling, now lying down.
'Just do it. You can think about this later.' I told myself, finally finding the energy to roll out of bed (and stumble to the kitchen-) and go downstairs where I could hear chatter.

"Karl!" Tommy screamed, running towards me, "Wilbur won't let me have a cookie!!" He whined.
"Huh? Why not?" I asked.
Tommy froze for a moment, "psh I don't even have the slightest clue. Tell him to give me one!" He ordered.

I walk over to the kitchen, Wilbur is leant against the counter by the cookies, and Techno was sat backwards on a chair, facing him. Both were eating cookies and having a conversation about something or other.

"Wilbur, why can't Tommy have a cookie?" I asked, sceptical, of course Wilbur is his brother but he usually has good reason.

"Well," he started, glaring at Tommy, "he was being rather rude."
I raised an eyebrow at this, "really? What did he say?" I was intrigued, what could he have said that Wilbur would be so reluctant to give him a cookie.
"He called me a Bitch."
Techno chuckled a little at this, continuing to quietly eat his cookie.

"Really? That's it?" I replied, rather disappointed by the reason.
Wilbur gasped, "that's it??"
"I mean, doesn't Tommy call everyone that?" I defended.
"Well yeah, I just don't appreciate the rudeness."

"It's just 5 letters!" Tommy protested, "and it's true!"
"Shut up, Tommy." He passed me the tray, "cookie?"
I took one but then just passed it to Tommy.
"Aha!" The blonde cheered before scurrying away.
"Karl! The betrayal!" Wilbur gasped, dramatically holding his chest.

I just shrugged and left again, I don't deal with this right now.