Without You (Eren x Reader)

Reunion [43]

Jean knew the first moment his eyes saw Mikasa that he was head over heels. From her long black hair, full pink lips and slim frame caught his attention immediately upon first glance. What swayed his heart the most was the way Mikasa was able to carry herself from her fighting skills to her compassion for others, which warmed his heart.

The only thing that kept his feelings in the dark was Eren.

He was never sure of what those two were. He found out later that Mikasa was adopted into Eren's family after her parents were killed, but some days it never seemed liked they were siblings. Mikasa was always taking care of Eren like stopping him from getting into fights and caring for him when he got hurt. Even wearing the red scarf he gave to her when they were kids.

It infuriated him to watch Eren brush Mikasa's gestures off like they were meaningless. He could see the annoyance in Eren's face with Mikasa's caring for him. Jean lost count of how many times he wanted to be in Eren's shoes, to be cared for by Mikasa, and in return Jean would give his all to make her happy.

Jean would always pick fights with Eren mainly to let his frustrations out. It fueled his fire even further when Eren would gawk at Y/n clearly oblivious to Mikasa's gestures. It rotted him to his very core over how jealous he was.

In the 4 years following the retaking of Wall Maria Jean confirmed Mikasa and Eren's relationship more sibling with Eren's and Y/n relationship started to evolve. As hard as Y/n and Eren tried to hid their relationship from the others, it never went unnoticed. From the way Y/n and Eren sneaked little glances, their hands brush lightly against one another, or sneaking off on their own.

He saw the way Mikasa seemed content with Eren's relationship and continued to support him as any sister would.

It relaxed Jean, finally, after years of uncertainty that Mikasa and Eren saw each other as nothing more than brother and sister.

So, he tried to make his move. Talking to her more, getting to know her better, and walking with her alone when he could. He tried to sway her but found it more challenging with everyone's focus in dealing with Marley. Mikasa also couldn't seem to let her demeaner down for even just a moment with all the obstacles they were facing.

Eventually the two found themselves forming a deep respect for one another as friends. He had hope to continue this friendship until everything would settle down. That wasn't the case though as things only got worse.

Him and the others realized not long after the rumbling that Eren and Y/n were never going to be found and decided to declare them dead. Jean felt guilty that he couldn't help his friends. He felt even more horrible when he realized what Eren's true intentions were, and his last words to Y/n were that he was ready to kill Eren.

His heart broke further seeing the look on Mikasa and Armin's faces when they decided to stop searching for Y/n and Eren. He tried talking to Mikasa, but she would just sit there with a sad look on her face. He tried comforting her, taking her outside, but she would just remain quiet.

It went on for nearly a year until Jean reached his breaking point. He snapped at Mikasa, told her to move on with her life and continue living with people that care about her. He didn't mean say what he said his feelings just took over as he blurted them out. He remembers the look on Mikasa's face of shock and the tears threatening her eyes. Jean knew he had lost his chance of ever being with her, so he turned around and left.

Later that evening he sulked in his bedroom until a knock erupted from the door. He wanted to be left alone but soon found himself slowly dragging himself to the door as the knocking persisted. Jean remembers clear as day opening the door finding Mikasa standing there nervously. His heart started racing as he stood staring at her form. Lowly he heard her mutter out a 'thank you'.