I was an addict but I never thought I would get addicted to you, but as soon as our eyes meet I was stuck, blinded by your beauty.
I knew life would end with you.
Trigger warnings
Drug-, alcohol abuse, overdose, suic!de, self harm, body image
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Chapter 17 ~
"Is she asleep?"
"Nah she's dead, dead,"
"Shut up guys,"
I woke up and with my eyes still closed I listened to their voices. "Should we like pour water on her?" Jake whispered. "No dumbass," Blake said. "Shit sorry it was just a thought," I opened my eyes and Billies face was inches away from mine.
"What the fuck," I whispered
"Wake up," she said smiling at me.
"I AM," I widened my eyes at her. "Why the fuck are y'all here?" I asked the twins and Billie.
"Zeths birthday is today," Billie said.
"So why are you here?" I brushed my fingers through my tangled hair.
"We are going to surprise him," Billie reached out her hand and I dragged me up.
I yawned and looked around my room.
"Well get out I need to dress,"
I picked up a pair of baggy unwashed jeans from the floor and searched my dresser for a T-shirt. I found an old on with a corny text on it. Virginity rocks. As I turned around I meet with a black haired girl who still had not left my room.
"Is this okay?" I held out the T-shirt and Billie raised her eyebrow.
She looked at me funny before letting out a little laugh. "great,"
"Get out now bil,"
"No fucking way, I'm staying,"
I sighted and turned my back to her. Billies eyes burned into my place skin as I dressed it. I knew she watched and when I turned around her eyes meet mine.
"That shirt is really beautiful," she said.
"Only the shirt?" She smiled as she shook her head.
I gave her a soft kiss. "Sorry morning breath," I whispered and pulled away. "What time is it?"
Billie took out her phone. "5,"
"Assholes," I said and grabbed billies hand to pull her of the bed.
The cold air woke me up as we approached Zeths house. Jake knocked lightly on the door and we got let in. As we hid behind the corner we watched as Zeths parents and little sister walked passed us with a cake. The candle lighted up the dark corridor as the parents started to sing. After a few tones we all joined in.
As the door opened up we made ours self as tiny as possible behind the parents and walked into the room. We weren't hiding really but no one questioned it.
"Happy birthday!" We screamed as we jumped up from the incredible hiding space.
His face lit up and my grin grew wider. His parents continued to sing and his little sister did her best attempt too. Blake threw himself onto the bed as he shouted happy birthday and Jake joined. Zeth groaned in pain as he tried to free himself form the two of them.
We spent the morning there. Watched as the sun finally shined through the window and it was time to leave his house.
"I don't get it, why don't you skip school at your birthday," Jake said. "Do you love being miserable that much?"
"If I skip you all skip," Zeth answered.
"Yeah that's the point,"
"You're a parents dream Zeth," Billie said and rolled her eyes.
"Yeah nah but I'm better than y'all," Zeth said and smiled at Billie.
"Do any of you know Pythagoras thorem?" the teacher asked the class.
"So what should I expect for tonight?" Zeth asked. Jake got up and walked to the other side of the classroom and joined a conversation with two blonde girls.
"We are going to make sure you feel taken care of," Billie said. Jake walked back two us and the teacher broke up our conversation.
"Jake if you don't sit down you are going to the principal and when I speak I expect you all to show respect,"
"They are coming," Jake whispered and looked back at the two blondes.
The mall was crowded as I walked from store to store.
"Couldn't you have said earlier that Zeth birthday was today," I said stressed as I browsed the clothing rack.
"I'm sorry," Billie said.
"What the fuck should I even get him?"
I couldn't even think of a color he liked. Or a brand he wore. What was even his size. Is getting a shirt boring. Yeah. Fuck.
"Billie fucking help," I turned around facing her. She reached out her hand and brushed out a hair of my face.
"Calm down, yeah?" She said softly. "You don't have to get him anything,"
"But I want to,"
"Let's get him a nice cologne," Billie said and we left the store.
People flooded into Jake and Blake's house and the music drowned the load talking people. I raised agains Billies chest and tried keeping up with the conversations. Her arms held me steady but still we rocked from side to side.
Happiness filled the drunk people. I didn't remember the last time I spoke with Zeth but I knew he enjoyed the attention.
"Billie?"
"What?"
"Let's sit down," we sat down on a crowded couch. It really didn't matter who was here and who wasn't. I didn't care and didn't worry. I was in this moment.
"How are you?" Billie asked. I shock my head.
"No, let's switch this game," I begun. "you are always the one to ask, how are you Bil?"
Some would describe Billies as perfect, as typical pretty. That's boring, everyone could be pretty and Billie was not boring. Her eyebrows was thicker than the prettier girls and hers was uneven. Her eyes were icier than those prettier girls. Her hair was damaged from all the times she has hid her natural color. Being something other than the blue print don't make someone ugly and being the blue print doesn't make someone better. I always fall into thing those blue print girls are uglier but they are not. I just fell in love with someone that didn't look like that.
With Billie nothing is a flaw, all those things about her is why I want her. No one dares to talk to her if she isn't the one to start the conversation. She choose me to start that conversation. Nothing in the way she looks makes her anything less than the prettiest girl I have ever seen.
"I'm fine," she said and kissed my lips. "Now, you?"
