Breathing you |b.e

Cup covered in pee cup

Chapter 5
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I had cried until I couldn't breath than I had drowned. My thoughts was not hurting me anymore and my moms words didn't play in repeat. I was a disappointment. Sure but this was the only way I could breath.

My phones vibrations woke me up from the haze. Billie. I knew time had passed and it was hours ago I was with her but exactly how many was a mystery. I answered it and her face stared right at me.

"I can't see anything,"

The room spun as I stumble to turn on the light switch. When the light filled the room Billie was staring at me the camera.

"Yo what have you taken,"  her face was so close to the camera so I covered it an Billie sighted loudly.

"Hey come on, where are you?"  Her voice was worried and it was my turn to sight.

"Home, bye Billie," I hung up an threw my phone at my bed.

I didn't need to hear Billie thoughts on this too. I knew it was becoming a problem but I still had it under control. I dropped my body on the bed and kept my eyes on the roof.

But than the door opened and there she stood. Her black hair tied up in a bun and her body dressed in sweats. Her faced wax also dressed but in a worry as she quickly walked into the room.

"What-," I began but my words seemed to disappear.

"You good?" She asked as she walked even closer to me.

"Why are you here?" A anger came over me that I couldn't hide.

Did I ask her to come, no so why was she here.

"I was worried Sam, shit. You looked and still look fucked as hell and all that overdoes thing you told me. I- was just worried okay," Billie had seen my anger and was now trying to protect herself.

I had so many questions but as soon as I opened my mouths they seemed to disappear.

"How did you get inside?"

"I opened the door and I walked inside," her answer would have made me laugh every other day but just not in this moment so I just started blankly at her.

"Your mom let me in,"

Fuck.

"What the fuck did you tell her?!" I said and quickly got up from my bed.

"Not much, but just that I was worried and that you looked kind of off,"

"You what?" My anger spread across my body and I tried my hardest not to lash out on her.

She walked closer and lightly touch my arm but immediately when I felt her skin I'm mine I took a step back.

"Don't touch me,"

"Sorry," she also took a step back and looked at me. "Sorry I'm sorry," her voice was genuine and I did all in power to cool down.

So when I sat down on my bed I let Billie sit down beside me and when her head fell on my shoulder I let it stay there.

"When was the last time you smoked?" I asked

"Weed?"

"Uh-hum,"

"Like a day or two ago," she responded.

Shit.

"Do you have any drug free friends?"

She though for awhile.

"Yeah I mean Chloe I think,"

Chloe. It took a while but than it clicked. That blonde girl. That fucking blonde girl that Billie was with.

"She need to pee in a cup for me"

"What?" She cited her head and looked at me confused.

"For a fucking drug test bil," I turned to look at her." My moms going to test me and if I fail that shit it's back to absolute no trust"

"You sound experienced as fuck," her joke didn't land and I gave her a glare.

"But I need it early okay?"

"Okay,"

She stayed that night. My anger drifted away slowly as my eyes became heavier and heavier. This girl beside me was special. Annoying, but special. For this moments she was mine. Whatever we was. She was here, with me.

The sun blinded me as I fumbled around my room. I was so tired and I wasn't sure what was real or what I had dreamt. I hoped that Billie had been here. I hoped our night wasn't a memory nor a side effect from the drugs I had put into me.

When my body was dressed again I waited at my window for her. The plus side was that if I didn't see here it all would have been a lie that I had convinced myself and my mom wouldn't bust me but if it was true I hoped to god that she would get here soon. And then I saw her.

She had been here. Fuck now I had to pass a fucking drug test. I made my way down the stair quietly and opened the door for her.

"Here," she said as she held a plastic cup in front of her.

"You got to be kidding me,"

It was a plastic cup, without a cap or anything. She glared at me.

"What, I did what you asked. She peed in a cup and here's the fucking cup,"

"Thank you," I said and took the wet cup.

"I spilled some,"

I glared at her and she glared back at me.

"Fuck I need to go but see you at school," she nodded back at me and I closed the door.

Without spilling anymore piss I walked up to my room and replaced the cup with a glue bottles that I put in my pocket. Than I stomped around my room extra loud so my mom would know I was awake and just in a matter of second she knocked on my door.

"Get outside now Samantha,"

I breathed deeply before facing her. She stood just outside my door with a face so disappointed it hurt.

"I hope this is not some kind of game for you," she said as she handed me a plastic cup and looked at the bathroom door.

I lowered my head and walked inside.