The Forbidden Blade

Chapter Forty Five

I stare at myself in the mirror. Wearing the sleek black tuxedo, getting ready to be the best man at the wedding of the girl I love. I brush off and fix my sleeves where the sound wave tattoo I got a couple of days ago seeps out. I never got to show her, the one tattoo I got that does have a meaning to it. I suck in a breath. I have to, I know I can't but I'll regret it if I don't. 
I just need to see her
as my lover
not my brothers. Just one last time.

+++

And here I was standing in front of her door as I hesitantly knocked on the door. There's a moment before the door opens and I encounter Anna. 
"oh, Alex! I thought it was your brother again, he's been trying to sneak a peek all morning! wait your not helping him are you?" Anna exclaims eyeing me carefully
who wouldn't want to sneak peek when their bride is the most astonishing woman ever.
I offer a curt smile that's killing me to show
"No, just here to give the bride a heads up on my speech" 
"Well then come on in I was just heading out, the bride wants pumpkin ice cream" anna rolls her eyes walking away from the door leaving me alone with the open door. 
I take a deep breath and walk in turning around the corner to see Alara staring at herself in the full-length mirror. She's wearing the skin-tight dress that opens up a long train in the back. Her long dark strands are curled and placed over one shoulder where there are small jewels and flowers pinned in it. I think I forgot how to breathe as I exhale a large breath.
She turns around and I swallow hard trying not to meet her eye.
"what's the heads up on the speech?"She asks 
I look down at my black shiny shoes and pull my bottom lip in between my teeth.
"There's no speech is there?" I shake my head and look up at her to catch her blue eyes looking down, her lips are covered in a burgundy shade of lipstick and her eyes sparkle with the gold shadow put over her eyes.
" Pumpkin ice cream, Huh?" I try to lighten the mood but she still doesn't look up at me instead now she pulls her bottom lips in between her teeth.  

I step a foot closer to her 
" Alara your going to have to look at me or I won't be able to do what I came here for" Her big blue eyes look up at me and I feel my heart deflate. 
I blink a few times trying to find my words instead I just roll up my sleeve and display my forearm where the matching soundwave is placed. I look away as I hear her breath hitch and feel her fingertips brush against my skin. I finally find the courage to look down at her seeing her trace that one tattoo.
" I planned on getting it done when we danced to the song that night" I talk over the huge lump in my throat
" I tried getting them to play the song today but you know how stubborn they are" She looks up at me but her bright eyes are covered behind tears. 
"Tell me not to" she rasps 
"Tell me not to and I won't Alex" If I didn't know how to hide my feelings this is where my tears would take control and I would sink into Alara's arms. Instead, I say what kills me as I say it.
"I cant"
"I know" She whispers rapidly blinking away her tears as they're on the verge of falling.
" We can't have the end we want, I can't give you the end you deserve" I grasp her chin 
"But your always going to be my middle Alara and that's where I'll always look back to"
Her lips whimper and I inch closer
"Promise you will too, promise you'll remember all our moments Alara, you can't forget what we had Alara, promise" 
She nods a few tears escaping her eyes, I lean down to kiss her one last time.
feeling the warmth and comfort that Alara makes me feel as our lips part away for the last time.
I look down at her taking in the moment where I see her as mine.

"I love you Alara Dola, I always have I just didn't know how much" but the words don't leave my mouth though the ones that do break my heart in two. 

"Goodbye Alara" The words kill me.
The sight of Alara looking up at me with her blue eyes filled with tears hurt me.
"Goodbye Alex" The words haunt me.