Chapter Forty Four

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Clunk Clunk the ice from the clippers in my hand drops into the cup containing my drink

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Clunk Clunk 
the ice from the clippers in my hand drops into the cup containing my drink. I put the ice away and grab my glass swirling the drink around as I walk over towards my father's desk where he sits doing some last-minute work.
"I'm sorry amore you're finally home and I'm here doing work" my father sighs looking up at me
"It doesn't matter papa I'll do it with you" I go over to grab a file but he slaps my hand away and I look up at him raising my brow 
"No amore your getting married in less than a week I'm not going to have you doing work" I roll my eyes and lean back on my chair 
"papa it's not a big deal" 
my father sits up folding both his hands to rest his chin on them.
"Alara can I ask you something"
the use of my actual name makes me look at him with attention
"yes papa" I nod and he sighs once again 
"Are  you happy with this marriage amore?" I relax and lean back in my chair 
"yes papa like I said I don't care"
"but you do, Alara we could arrange it," he says and I furrow my eyebrows hoping he's not saying what I think he's saying
"what are you talking about papa" I side-eye him and he chuckles 
"amore you think you could keep it from me, I don't mind the boy I like him more than the other one" I shake my head
"papa it's not like that" 
"no? then why does he look at you like you carry his world and him yours?" I crease my eyebrows and look down at my drink
"I've been paying attention to you two at dinner last night and there wasn't a second where he wasn't looking at you with a smile on his lips" my father smiles
"And I might have caught him leaving your room this morning" he adds and I shoot my head up towards him
"Papa!" my Italian accent strains my voice as I taunt him and he chuckles 

"why then amore? why these charades? all I have to do is say a word and you two are it" I look back at my drink in my hand. Cause it's not that simple if it was, Alex and I  would already be together by now. Alex still needs to seek revenge on his father and with Alonso on our tails, it wouldn't be possible if Alex and I got married. 

"you've got it, wrong father, it's not like that" I lie and I know he sees right through me
"if you say so amore you know yourself more than I, but do know that even though love doesn't exist in the mafia I once was very in love with your mother and I know it when I see it."  he smiles returning back to his files. 
I take the last sip of my drink and walk out of his office. 
Love?
god love?
To people love is joy
To people love is freedom
To me, love is forbidden
I walk up to my room and start heading in when Gilda walks up to me
"good afternoon ma'am" she smiles 
"Good afternoon to you Gilda what brings you?" I rearrange my blankets while I click the tv remote to turn the tv on as I jump on my bed
" Yes ma'am Mr blade told me to let you know he will be leaving early" Gilda nods fixing my room 
I freeze but act unfazed
"hmm, did he say when he'll be coming back" I'm not paying attention to the tv as I try to comprehend on Alex leaving without saying a thing?
" ma'am he told me to tell you he would see you at the wedding" my heart falters and I feel it deflate but I nod and wave her off.
"thanks, Gilda"she smiles and nods leaving as she closes the door. 


"13 men found shot and killed on the east docks in less than seconds officers still looking for suspects" 
I finally focus on the tv and I sigh, 


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