Scales of Twilight[18+][ NEEDS EDITING. READ AT OWN RISK]

Chapter Eleven: Starting over

Time seemed to become painfully slow the lo her I stayed away from Edward Cullen, even though I was torching him and myself, I couldn't go and face him or his family yet.

It wasn't approval or reassurance I was looking for, it wasn't even acceptance, it was just me fighting over the guilt I felt even though I didn't understand why.

*of course I know why... I just won't admit it, too much pride in the way.*

I know my deceased family wasn't happy about the situation, it wasn't the fact that I killed her, it was the fact that I wasss afraid id kill somwone else. I'm a dragon, we creatures are literal hot heads. We were the definition of the word. I shouldn't feel at fault and yet I did. Human emotions were fucking confusing.

Because I didn't have an understanding or a grasp on my humane conscious I was hurting hot me and Edward by staying away from him.

He's been coming by, checking on me, begging me to let him in. He'd even sit outside for hours and rest up against my back door as I sat on the other side, listening to I breathe. It was the only thing he could accept, for he couldn't touch me just yet.

"Eve...if you don't let me in, I'll break this door down. I don't wanna have to do that." He pleaded from the other side of the door, his voice strained. He ached to touch me as I ached to do the same to him.

*there are plenty of unsightly things I wanted to do to him...*

There was no denying it, I wanted him. His touch was the only thing that would be able to rid this pain, so why wasn't I let him in to console me. I ran away like a coward, and I am no such thing.

"Nieve! Please! Don't make me do this." He had found his resolve, after me avoiding him for two months straight and staying confined to my home with no breath of the outside air, he was worried I was harming myself. With a sigh I got up from my floor, hearing his sigh of relief as he thought I was gonna let him in. When he saw me making my way up the stairs to my room and disappearing from his view, he threw the door open, utterly breaking my handle and lock, racing up after me.

One moment I was walking into my bedroom, the next moment I was pined by him tangled in the sheets of my bed with him seething above me.

"Get out! I NEVER SAID YOU COULD COME IN!" My voice rang out in an atthurative shout which stalled him a moment before he constricted his grip on my wrist.

He didn't even bother acknowledging my threat, he just leaned down and assaulted my neck with painful nips of his teeth, a crazed growl escaping his lips. "You can wallow in your self-pity later! I will no longer be ignored or pushed away by you! You're hurting the both of us when you do. " he pulled his head up from my neck his eyes which were filled with anger moments before seemed to fill with his venom, yet the tears couldn't fall. I had hurt him even though I wasn't trying.

Seeing the sadness in his eyes made my eyes water, a heart-shattering sob making me shudder violently underneath him as I cried. His entire expression changed to one of alarm, quickly picking me up to hold against him tenderly. I cried loudly, I didn't even care if the entire world had heard me, for the pain I felt was gone.

I tortured myself for no reason, in fear of myself. For a while, I forgot that I wasn't alone anymore, yet I stayed locked in my home trying to sort through my emotions by myself when I could have let him in to help.

"Oh Edward, I'm so sorry." I wheezed, sucking in a shuddering breath, clutching onto him as he was my lifeline.

"Shh...Eve, please don't cry. I'm not angry with you." He gave me soothing words, rocking me slowly as he tied to get me to calm down. After a while, the tears finally stopped and I just rested comfortably against him. He held me against his body, his cold chin resting softly atop of my head as we started my room window.

"You have everyone worried. Alice hasn't stopped crying since you left. I don't even wanna get started on Esme. She hasn't left her room the day you disappeared."Edward seemed to be turned inward on himself just like I had seen when I had first seen him standing in front of his family home.

" I had a moment, I didn't want to be around anyone for a while. I didn't want to hurt anyone else." I glanced up at the atone cone statue holding me against him, watching his golden irises flicker down to me. " I told you before, Eve, that you need to give yourself more credit. You have nothing to be afraid of, from any of us." He grasped my face firmly between his cold alabaster grasp as he said this, his tone serious and unwavering, making it very clear to me that my fear was childish and that k was loved bet everyone in his family.

I stared at him for a long moment before giving him a tired smile of relief, laying my head against his cool chest.

"Can I spend the night with you and the other, I hate to say it but I miss Emmett's obnoxious laugh." I smiled into Edwards's chest, hearing his abused musical chuckle. "He'll be happy you said that. Pack a small back, I'm not letting you out of my ain't for a while." He kissed my forehead as he let me go, sitting meaI the foot of my bed, leaving the room.

I stared after him in wonder, intrigued to see what my life was going to turn into not that I had him.