It's Always Have and Never Hold

9. Jealousy

"Well... remember that girl I told you about?"

"Mhm?" She nodded, trying her best not to overshare her feelings.

"She really wants to come with us, on the trip. But, I just don't think I'm there yet, I really don't. It's only been a few weeks and I didn't think it would even become serious. She's not even my girlfriend yet, it's still... causal. I just, I need a second opinion-"

"Don't do it!" she said instantly, the words practically shooting out from her mouth, she forgot to hold back. "Sorry, that sounded harsh. I meant, just go with your gut feeling. And if that means she's not coming, then she should understand that you just aren't in that place yet."

"Yeah." He nodded, biting his lips between his teeth. "Is that all?"

"What do you mean?"

"That's all? Is there anything else... anymore reasons?"

"Reasons? I wasn't trying to convince you on telling her she can't come, it's your decision. You're a big boy, David. But hey, if you want to bring her, go ahead. You planned the trip, bring who you wanna bring." she said rather irritated.

"Right. Right. Okay, well I think I have to go, I need to get up early tomorrow and make sure the gas tank is filled for the trip. I'll pick you up at 8?"

"Mhm, I'll see you then."

They both got up and Jennifer showed David out, closing the door a bit too harshly and stomping like a child upstairs. She wanted to be furious that he could be bringing this woman, but yet again, how could she be? David's not asked her out, he's not showing much interest romantically currently... someone else is receiving that and Jennifer so badly wants it to be her. She wanted him to invite her, as more than a friend. Like a first couples trip, doubt that would happen if she doesn't tell him how she feels soon. Openly. Not just 'you read my mind, I read yours'.

...

The next day Jennifer woke up at 6 and went straight into the shower. As the warm water ran down her body she began rubbing shampoo into her hair. Once it was fully lathered and scrubbed properly, she rinsed it out thoroughly. Then she put conditioner in and rinsed that out too before washing her body. After another twenty minutes in the shower, shaving, exfoliating and singing, she got out and dried her hair quickly so she was ready for David picking her up.

She skimmed through her wardrobe and pulled out a pair of high waisted jeans, a white, cropped tank top and a pair of white sneakers. She grabbed her case and made her way downstairs once everything was done with upstairs. Next she made a bowl filled with granola, berries and yogurt. She put the bowl at the kitchen counter, sat on the bar stool and began eating. 

(Jennifer's Pov)

All I can think about is calling David to say I'm not going. I don't want to be there when she's there. It'll make everything so awkward. That is if she goes and, to be fair it would only be awkward if I made it, she wouldn't have any clue on how I'm feeling due to me and David not dating in the past. Maybe he'd know? I mean, we had such flirty times, we were awfully close really fast, we were like a couple. But unfortunately I just swallowed those feelings down, all I want is for it to stay down on this trip and not come up in word vomit. That's if I'm going. Now I know I shouldn't let anyone make me feel some type of way, and to be fair the poor woman wouldn't even know it. But I just don't want to make myself go through that if it makes me hurt more.

Without thinking I grabbed my cellphone from my pocket, dialling David's number. I bit down on my nails as I nervously waited for him to answer... but he didn't pick up.

"Hi, David. I'm really sorry it's such short notice, and I apologise deeply, but- but I don't think I can come. My dad, he uh, he wanted to spend time with me this week, I'd feel bad for going. Plus, all the guys are going, you'll have a blast with them. So, yeah. Again I'm really sor-"

The answering machine cut me off, sending to David. I threw the device down on the counter and made my way to the living room. I grabbed the remote and put the tv on, plopping myself down on the couch. I pulled the cover from the back of the couch onto me, wrapping myself up as I watched tv. Just as I was dozing off I heard my phone ringing. I quickly grabbed it and went back to my spot on the couch. I noticed it was David calling, I ignored it to spare any awkwardness between us. I don't do well with uncomfortable situations or confrontation.

The phone rang again.

And again.

And again.

The fifth time I decided to decline the call, letting him know I really didn't want to talk. Luckily that worked, he didn't call again.

Twenty minutes later I heard a pounding at my front door. Then shouting followed by it, it was David's voice.

"Jennifer Joanna Aniston, open the door!" He shouted, hitting the door an additional three times.

I jumped up from the couch with the blanket wrapped around my body, then opened the door to him. David slammed the door shut and pressed his hand against it, leaning all his body weight on the door. "Jen, what's going on? I've called you and you didn't answer after that- that message."

"David I can't go"

"Why?! Why, why can't you go? You've known about the trip for two weeks. Why didn't you say sooner. It's so abrupt that you must've been turned by something someone said or something I said. Please Jen, please just tell me why you can't go?" He took grasp of my hands, pleading for me to tell him the truth.

"I just can't!" I didn't want to say why, it was so childish. I really don't want him to feel as though he couldn't invite her, but I still don't want to lie. Which I'll just have to do to make things less awkward.

"That's not a good enough reason, Jennifer. I just want the truth."

"You really don't know?" My voice trembled, as my lip quivered. Why do I have to be so sensitive?!

"No- well... yeah!"

"Then you tell me." I whisper, wanting him to say it.

"Look, I'm not playing this game. As your best friend, or whatever I am to you, don't you think you owe me honesty? The truth? Please, just let me hear whatever is wrong"

"Nothing, I just, nothing..."

"That's it Jen?" He asked in disbelief, shaking his head as he let go of my hands, landing them on his hips.

"Yeah..."

"Okay" he had given up, he didn't want to turn this into an argument, that was the last thing he wanted. I know him, he doesn't like confrontation either. "So you aren't coming, are you?" I shook my head a few times. "I'll see you when I get back?"

"Yeah" i nodded. David leaned in and kissed the top of my head, my eyes shut as I savoured his lips on my skin. "Bye"

"Bye... love you"

A/N
Yes I'm sick of them not being together too! It makes me physically hurt. Anyways, mushy stuff coming up in the next few chapters and I hope you all enjoy!🤍