Our Beautiful Moments ✔️

Jake's Letter

⚠️Warning⚠️

This chapter may trigger emotions and causes pain. Therefore, I advise you to embrace yourself, chooouuur. But really.

"Love, Stacy Hannah Belleau, I sincerely gratify you for coming into my life. Those years felt like an eternity for me. Our moments of alwaysness remind me of the knot we tied on the bench together. We were inseparable despite the challenges in our relationship. How we endured those obstacles, how we stayed beside each other when life gave us a thousand reason to leave, how we stood still and facing what's ahead of us, together, will always move me from the depths of my heart. I couldn't find one specific reason why I love you as there were things you have and you do that makes me fall for you every single day that passes by. People say that you only love a person if you don't know why you love them. But I'm proving them wrong with this letter.

I had all the time in the world to show you what true love is, and I had all the time in the world to be experience what is it like to have your love be reciprocated. You've shown me what true love is. A love that is committed and valued, and above all, a love that is respected and honored above the Most High. From making those pinky promises to living with those promises to the end.

My first and my last, phew. I'm deeply honored to be gifted with such a real love from God. You've taught me a lot of things that I thought I didn't need to be taught for the nth time. A friend who stays by my side when times get rough. Not only you are my lover, but also my friend. God gave me you, Stacy. You probably looked up to me because I live with my values and I'm the rare 'person with integrity' guy. I remember you used to use me as your reference to your ideal man we were friends. You're the friend who holds on to me even when everyone is telling you to let go. You're the friend who prioritizes your time with me as your boy friend. You're the friend who jokes around, telling people your embarrassing moments and dragging my name along, and I couldn't be more thankful for that.

True love, though my mind is still not certain of the meaning but I have found it in you. Love has such a great value that holds everything in their places, I'm glad you are my love. Erase that so I may declare that you are my one true love. 

When I first heard of my illness, all I could think was you, and how to relay the news to you, knowing that it would hurt you. Don't be mistaken that my family kept this a secret, my love. It was my decision to do so. I couldn't bear to see you suffer in the last 6 months of my life. I decided to not let you know until my cowardice vanishes, but I'm ashamed to say that we've come to this point, my love. It was heartbreaking to see you or to hear you cry your heart out. My illness will cause great harm to you, and I never wished or intended to do that. How could I?

At first, I couldn't understand why God put me into this situation and I know that you will question Him too. For that, I do not know, but perhaps, this is His way of saying that all is now well and the time has come. Perplexing, right? But my love, God's way is not our way. So, we'll never know why He put us in this situation. To still have a chance or not, I do not care. All I wish is to fulfill my promise to God as I promised to Him that I will love you as long as I live.

I adore you and I cherish all those time we were together and when we were far from each other. I've memorized all the details of your face and I have carved it at the back of my mind. There's a rainbow after the rain, my sweet Stacy. I believe God gave me this exact amount of time, not inadequate yet not too much.

Love, I love my life because my life is you.  As Daniel Haughian said and I quote, 

"As long as there is time, 

as long as there is love,

as long as there is you,

and as long as I have a breath to speak your name—even when I don't have