JoJo's Bizzare Ships

Too Little, Too Late

Part: Stardust Crusaders
Pairing: KakJota [Kakyoin x Jotaro]

Summary:
Noriaki never knew, that the day him and Jotaro finally exchanged the dairies they kept - would be the last time he'd see him smile...

Content Warning:
- suicide | depression | death
- homophobia (mention) | suggestive themes
- grief | heartache

Published: June, 26th 2021
Word-Count: 1,581

Bruno_Nik this...was a doozy
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The ink pen lingered on the last word for a little too long and a dark spot began to form upon the page. A trembling hand quickly pulled back the pen: there couldn't be anything in this that was obscured or damaged, it all had to be perfect: if he wanted this to work. If this was to be his last words, his dying wishes: everything had to be perfect. For if it wasn't nobody would remember him. He'd be another nameless face among the thousands of people like him. What had even drove him to just a state? He could write it all down: but, it was too much of a hassle. This was easier. There would be no sappy goodbye, no dying wishes. This: silly little notebook would be his last act on this earth. 

Well: besides giving it to the man he adored above everything. You'd would think love would save him from this, but how could it? When his love: was forbidden. If he could never truly live in this world as himself, with the one he loved by his side - in truth and without deception, what was the point of living at all? That was his logic. Those were the thoughts that had led him down this path - and nothing was going to stop him now. 

He had the date and time. He had the tool, the will, and the strength. Without even showering a glimmer of his internal turmoil, he looked up and closed the notebook. He tied the ribbon he had around it. A smile filled his lips, as he gazed at Kakyoin: sweet, ignorant Kakyoin. He almost rethought his entire plan at the sight of him. Did he truly wish to cause this man pain? More than he had already been put through his entire life. Jotaro paused. Noriaki was a strong man. He could move on. He could heal. Unlike, Jotaro. Who refused to change it seemed, no matter how hard he tried. Who was simply, a burden upon others: dragging them down with him into his world of bleak darkness. 

No. If he really did love, Noriaki, he'd cut himself out of his life.

"Here," his own voice sounded foreign to him. "Just had to add some final touches." 

If only he could relish in the shining grin he was given, "And here's mine! Let's hope I didn't write anything too embarrassing in there."

"And let's hope," Jotaro's voice drifted off. "Mine doesn't break your heart too much." 

Noriaki tilted his head, "What in the world is that supposed to mean...?"

He was only given a strange smile in response, as Holly's car pulled up to the school. "Nothing..."

[---]

When he received the news: it didn't sink in for a good few seconds. He simply told the shaken Mrs.Kujo goodnight - and walked through his house, not hearing his parents moving to the door and striking up a concerned conversation with Holly. His feet dragged across the floor, riddled with chains that snaked their way through his flesh and bone: carrying thousand-pound weights as he forced himself to move. He couldn't collapse in the hallway. He couldn't stop his knees from hitting the floor though the second, he was behind closed doors. The tears spilled over coating his lashes and blurring his vision: his entire room spun as salty water droplets poured down his face. It almost felt like they were scorching a trail down his face, the bitter salt of grief marking him for the rest of his life.