getting home

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monday afternoon we all uber home. jaden and charli had to buy us all lunch since they went upseteais first. anthony and avani got to pick where we are since they went up last. josh comes to my house with me. i go to my room to unpack and when i come back down, my dad and josh are in the kitchen arguing.

jordan: i needed you there josh!
josh: i'm sorry. this was katelyns only prom and-
jordan: you needed to be there!! there's no excuse!
josh: i- i'm sorry sir. it won't happen again.
jordan: your damn right it won't. because your fired!

i go into the kitchen where they can see me.

you: you can't fire him! he loves his job
jordan: katelyn you are not a part of this. go upstairs

josh looks at me and nods. i hesitantly go up.

•••

a bit later josh comes up.

you: so what happened??
josh: he ended up not firing me because i'm 'too important'
you: what do you mean?

he sits in my bed.

josh: we promised not to keep secrets so um- i think i should tell you some thing.

i look at him with a confused look on my face. i sit on my bed next to him and he just hugs me.

josh: you know i love you. right?

i nod.

josh: you've gotta promise not to get mad when i tell you this.
you: i can't promise until you tell me what's going on. your scaring me j.

he sighs a bit.

josh: i've um- i've been working with your dad for almost three years now. so since i was 16
you: huh? you've only known me for a year

he nods.

josh: this is where im hoping you won't be mad. so um usually my job is just the run errands for him or get him coffee. quick little jobs that gave me at least some money. then one day he um... he asked me if i- i would date his daughter. he said he would pay double my salary

josh looks down at his feet.

you: y- your dating me for money??

ouch. this hurts.

josh: he showed me who you were and told me about you. i said i'd gladly ask you out without the pay. you seemed amazing. but he insisted on paying me m
you: o- our whole relationship is a lie. you were being paid to date me
josh: no no no. it's not a lie! i really do love you baby. i promise. i stopped accepting pay from your dad around homecoming.

he looks at me to see the tears in my eyes.

josh: don't cry. please. i really do love you

i just look at him.

josh: and there's another thing...

he seems sorry and kinda worried too.

josh: i don't work for your dad anymore. i work with him now. back when your house got broken into and you got- hurt- remember when i yelled at him?

i nod.

josh: well when we went to talk he said he likes that way i stick up for something i'm passionate about and believe in. he made me his stand in type thing. so when he's home, i fill in his place. that's why he's been around more and i haven't.

this isn't fucking helping the fact that my dad paid josh to date me. he probably paid my friends too.

josh: and- this parts probably gonna hurt the worst.

what could he possibly still be keeping from me?!

josh: so your dad has... doctors appointments more often now. i fill in when he's not there. well apparently he had one on friday and i was supposed to be there for an important meeting. but your dad didn't tell me he had an appointment, so i thought it was just normal sitting in the office and shit.
you: what do you mean doctors appointments josh?
josh: princess... your dad- he um... he has cancer

my mouth drops and my eyes fill with more tears.

you: n- none of you t- told me?
josh: he said not to tell you until you found out that whole truth. i'm sorry

he hugs me tight. i tried to go downstairs to hug my dad but he had left. either for work or doctors. as mad as i am at josh, he holds me and i cry.

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