28: flashlight

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Short A/N before you start, at the beginning you might be very confused but I'll explain everything to the end of the chapter so please just read it, thank you.

"Hi." Louis' voice was quiet, the wind was loud. He sounded not okay, more in agonizing pain and somehow broken.

"You're probably asleep or are dealing with your own problems right now. But I kind of have to just .. let everything out because that feeling is too much to handle and I just need to talk" He continued and sniffled.

"But you're not answering your phone."

Harry captured his bottom lip between his teeth, rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and got out of the bed, ready to wake Niall up and get him to drive to Louis' home.

"I just kind of need to rant and since you are the only person that can understand me.. yeah, well, lately everything is getting worse" Louis began, his voice was trembling which made a lump form in Harry's throat. He tried to ignore the bad feeling and shook Niall's shoulder, but he was sleeping like a bear.

This just can't be good. "There hasn't been a single night without crying myself to sleep. This feeling just won't go away. And it hurts. But at the same time it doesn't."

Louis laughed brokenly, now it being clear that he was outside since the wind was making things obvious.

"It's just this feeling in my stomach and chest area and I actually can't describe it but it makes me want to scream because it's so much" He tried to explain and felt so very embarrassed and ridiculous, because this was just so stupid.

He breathed in shakily, wanting to stop himself from crying but he just couldn't. The tears would just keep coming and he knew in a few hours they will be used up and all there will be left are tear stained cheeks and tired hurting eyes that begged for sleep.

Another sniffle from Louis that made Harry's heart break and shake Niall's shoulder harder for him him to just wake up because things are not alright.

"I just .. feel so uncomfortable with myself. More than I have ever felt before" Louis paused and with every passing second Harry's fear was growing of what was to come next, "And I'm so fucking scared that this feeling will just stay."

Niall finally opened his eyes and the first thing he saw was Harry's frightened face that immediately told him everything he needed to know. "Louis?" He asked for confirmation and got a nod in return, making him roll out of bed and head downstairs in a hurry with Harry close behind.

"If it will, I know that I won't stay very long. At least that's what I think. I hate being here. I hate being myself. I just hate being me" Louis' voice got louder to the end, making his frustration so much more clearer that it scared Harry to even knock at his door when they arrive.

"The fear of this feeling staying forever is eating me up inside". Somehow Louis' voice now being agonizingly quiet wasn't making things any better. It was barely a whisper.

Louis was broken and it seemed like he didn't got a single day off to just heal. It was unfair, really.

"I'm scared that I will wake up with this feeling in my guts everyday. That's not what I want. I'm scared that this all will just stay. But I want it to go away. I'm scared that one day, I won't feel anything but this exact feeling."

There was short silence that was weighing down on Harry's shoulders and made him bite his fingernails anxiously, silently praying that Louis was okay right now. That he's just still here.

The next words were hushed and spoken with a shaking voice before they were cut off.

"Please just save me from myself."

Meanwhile Louis was laying outside as it rained, the cigarette was no longer burning because really all things end.

Angels kept crying on him, perhaps to stop him from crying because he's been laying there for some hours now, he didn't looked good and to anyone else he probably would've looked dead.

He was shivering but was unable to move, he couldn't bring himself to move his feet and get up, he couldn't bring himself to get back inside where his sisters were sleeping, he couldn't bring himself to fight against those demons that were splashing in the water he wanted to drown them in.

Louis just couldn't bring himself to keep living anymore.

Three hours have passed since Louis called Harry and spoke on his voicemail, three hours have passed since Louis headed outside for some fresh air and ended up drowning on dry land.

Harry cursed himself for sleeping through his phone ringing, he wanted to freak out about it but this was about Louis and so there were no other things but this boy on his mind.

When the two finally arrived, the first thing they saw was a person laying there on the ground, they weren't moving and it was scary.

Recognition dawned on his face as Harry realized who this dirty gray jacket belonged to. Terror overtook his face before the colour drained out of it.

He got out of the car and rushed up to the boy's side, turning him around and cupping his cold cheeks as the blue lips and closed eyes were the things that finally made him cry.

"Louis? Come on, Louis. Wake up, hey! Louis!"

Harry started off quiet and with hushed whispers until his voice got desperate and filled with fear.

Niall shook his best friends shoulder to stop him from screaming and yelling and tried to calm him down.

"We have to get him inside, come on, help me" He said, "Grab him under the armpits and I'll carry his legs."

It's been nearly a month since Harry and Niall started talking again and nearly a month since John has come over.

Things have changed, for the better and the worse. The two best friends found their way back together quickly, they were staying at each other's houses again and spent time together at school.

Everything was back to the old things and the same thing goes for Louis.

Harry was like his flashlight, always guiding him through the dark night and making sure he wasn't lost and stumbled over things that could hurt him. Harry was always there, making his dark world a little more colourful.

You see, Harry didn't left. Harry didn't stopped being his flashlight and left him alone by himself. He was still there.

Louis has just fallen deeper and the further away he slipped from the light, the darker it got and so Louis simply became blind.

So yeah, a month passed yay.
Also a quick message from C (my soulmate but I'm not sure if they want me to tell their name), they love you guys because you're all literally so sweet and make me happy. :)
I haven't checked for any mistakes so sorry for that.
Hope u enjoyed this chapter and stay safe x

[ WC: 1203 ]

a louis to go, please! » stylinson auHikayelerin yaşadığı yer. Şimdi keşfedin