Three's a crowd

35

The nightmares continued to plague my sleep for a while. It had been two weeks and our parents had reverted back to just letting us stay together on weekends.

The downside to their decision, other than not having someone to sleep beside, was that the dreams were a lot more terrifying when I couldn't reach for him in the middle of the night.

Of course my parents were home and just down the hall, but something about waking up to a dark empty room, knowing you're completely alone, didn't make it any easier to get back to sleep.

People at school had started to notice, Kyle and Ava had noticed and Riley had definitely noticed. He acted differently towards me, always looking as if he had something to say but was too afraid or unsure of whether to actually say it.

I can't say I blamed him. I looked like crap most of the time. The lack of sleep had definitely taken its toll on my ability to care about looking good, and my mood.

I had been closed off, quiet. Honestly it seemed like it would be better for everyone if I disappeared. There wouldn't be any Carl drama if I was removed from the equation.

I was sitting with Riley, Ava and Kyle at lunch when that familiar turning in my stomach and chill ran over my body.

I didn't look up or even respond to the feeling, I just kept pushing my food from one side of my plate to the other as everyone shot worried glances at each other.

I knew it was Carl. He had been leaving me alone for the most part, of course I wasn't ever alone for him to bother, but since there was only one cafeteria, our paths crossed occasionally.

"Hey, do you wanna go for a walk?" Riley whispered in my ear.

I nodded and he wrapped his arm around my waist as we walked outside to the field.

"Britt, what's going on? I can tell somethings bothering you." He stopped turning me to face him.

"Nothing, I'm fine, promise." I lied.

I knew he could see right through me. That he knew I was lying to him, but he didn't question it.

"Okay well, when you do want to talk about it you know where I am."

"I know, I'm fine."

I was not fine. In fact I was far from it. I felt numb, like I was going through the motions of everyday without actually being a part of any of it.

Some days, the harder ones, I didn't even feel like getting up at all. It almost felt like the world was a priceless piece of art, full of happiness, and I was the black sharpie ruining every piece of it I came into contact with.

I knew it was stupid to think that way, to think I had that much control over other people. Still everything had changed since that fight. My dreams were more vivid than they had been all those years ago, and I knew that given the chance Carl would do whatever he wanted.

Riley pulled me into him as I nuzzled into his chest. I know this wouldn't be as hard if he was with me all the time. Stupid parents with stupid rules prevented that. So while they thought they were looking out for me, I was actually climbing into a dark spiraling hole.

After the last class was over, I met Riley as usual to go home. As we drove I noticed he wasn't going towards my house.

"Where are we going?" I asked.
"Well it's Friday so I figured I would cheer you up and then we can go to my house? Unless you just want to go home?" He questioned.

"No!" I blurted out a little too forcefully. "I mean, I don't want to go home."

"Britt, you're starting to scare me, what's going on?" He laced out fingers together as he took a left out of town.