kickin' it | femina bellator

30 | indiana eddie

It was the last day of school before summer vacation and that was enough to lift everyone's mood. "Last day of school. Whoo!" Jerry ran up to Milton, Jack and Azalea who stood by their lockers. "Until summer school. Whoo" he added less enthusiastically.

"I've gotta find a way to get my Venus Flytrap home for the summer" Milton told them.

"It's just a plant, dude. Take it home," Jerry said.

"I've been growing it hydroponically with a synthetic photosynthesis light since the first day of school and it's pretty huge" Milton explained.

"It's not even eating flies anymore. It's eating meatballs," Jack added.

Jerry scoffed, "Right. A plant that eats meatball," he walked over to open Milton's locker only for the plant to burp meatballs at him.

"That is a sight I never thought I would see," Azalea grimaced as Jerry started tasting the meatballs.

"Yeah, that's definitely a meatball."

"Hey, did you guys get your end of the year career evaluation from the guidance counsellor," Kim asked as she joined the group.

"Yes, I did, and they are a joke," Milton said grumpily, "Mine says I'm best suited to be a farmer. I'm allergic to cows, terrified of hay, and seriously" he slid down his cardigan to reveal his not so muscled arms, "do these shoulders look like they can hold up overalls?"

"You thinks your is bad?" Azalea scoffed, "Mine said I would suit as a therapist. I'm allergic to hearing people whine about their problems, I would probably punch someone who came in to complain about their fear of hay and seriously — I would probably laugh in the wrong situations."

"I didn't even pick mine up. No one believes a word those things say," Jack said.

"I just got my career evaluation. I believe every word that this thing says!" Eddie ran over to them with an excited grin.

"Look how happy no one is, Jackie" Azalea bumped his shoulder.

"Really?" Kim asked sceptically.

"Yup," Eddie said, "You are looking at a new Eddie. I'm gonna be an archaeologist, baby! I'll be discovering lost cities, travelling the high seas, navigating the globe and now — to Spanish class."

"Eddie, honey," Azalea stopped his as he marched away, "Your Spanish class is that way."

"I knew that."

☆★☆

"Hey, you know what?" Rudy said to Eddie as the rest of the gang entered the dojo, "I have the hat and bullwhip from the Bobby Wasabi classic The Stinks and the Sphinx. You can totally have it."

"What? Thanks!" Eddie said gratefully and Rudy walked into his office to get it.

"Eddie, are you still talking about your career evaluation?" Jack asked him, "I told you, it doesn't really mean anything. I mean, the day Zalee becomes a therapist we should all check in on an asylum for the insane."

"Naw, thanks," Azalea said sarcastically, punching his shoulder, "I can say it, you can't."

"Seriously? Archeologists?" Kim asked in disbelief, "You come from four generations of accountants."

"That is not true," Eddie told them, "My grandfather was a urologist."

"Eddie you are not exactly the explorer type" Milton tried to tell him, "Remember that Easter egg hunt? You didn't find any eggs and you lost your basket."