kickin' it | femina bellator

50 | meet the mckrupnicks

"I can't believe I'm spending my vacation at the Animal Park sitting behind an elephant waiting for him to pass the Zoo Director's cellphone," Jerry complained.

"Ugh," Kim said in disgust.

"It could be worse," Jack reasoned.

"Oh, it is. I have to call bin when I find it," Jerry said.

"How are you gonna call him if his phone is inside an elephant?" Azalea snorted.

"Milton is so lucky," Kim exclaimed, "He gets to go to Scotland with his parents."

"I'm so jealous." Azalea admitted.

"Oh, no, he's not going anymore," Jack told them, "His dad had some work thing come up-" he stopped talking when they heard bagpipe music playing.

"What is that awful sound?" Kim asked looking around.

"Sounds like a dying donkey," Jack observed.

The music grew louder and they turned to see Rudy entering the dojo while playing a bagpipe. Milton was a few steps behind him looking mildly annoyed.

"Takes people years to learn how to play one of these things," Rudy said and the music continued playing so he turned around to show the stereo that was hanging on his back. Milton clicked on the off button, "Suckers."

"What's with the vacuum cleaner?" Jerry asked.

"It's a bagpipe," Azalea deadpanned.

"The traditional instrument of my mother country Scotland," Milton said in a terrible Scottish accent.

"I thought you weren't going," Kim said in confusion.

"I wasn't but the first class tickets were non-refundable," Milton said, "So, I convinced my parents to let me turn them into — six coach tickets."

"Which means, we are all going to Scotland!" Rudy added in excitement.

"WE ARE GOING TO SCOTLAND?"

"Oh, I have always wanted to learn how to play the bagpipes," Jack picked up the bagpipes.

"We are staying with my grandfather at our family Castle," Milton explained.

"Any chance your family wants to adopt me?" Azalea asked, "I have always wanted to have a family Castle in Scotland."

"Ask dad," Milton told her before turning to the guys, "And we can even wear kilts."

"What's a kilt?" Jerry wondered.

"It's like a skirt for men," Milton explained.

"I'm in," Jerry said, dead serious.

"Hey, Jackie, honey," Azalea looked at her boyfriend's poor attempt to play the bagpipe, "I think you are blowing too much air into that."

"No, I'm trying to build up the pressure. It's all clogged," Jack said and a second later the bagpipe exploded. "Sorry," he smiled sheepishly.

"At least it's not clogged anymore."

☆★☆

Milton's grandfather led them through their family castle and Azalea was in awe of the beautiful scenery. "Thank you for picking us up from the airport, grandpa McKrupnick," Kim said, "We could have taken a cab."

"No," Rudy said sarcastically, "Then we would have missed the eight hour ride in the manure wagon." He earned himself a sharp shove from his sister.

"You are here at an exciting time," Grandpa McKrupnick said excitedly, "Tonight we have the banquet. And tomorrow —we start the great games!"