kickin' it | femina bellator

74 | fight at the museum

Azalea entered the dojo alongside Jack and Jerry to find Rudy watching tv. "Hey, Rudy," Jerry greeted him, "What are you watching?"

"What Did You Do?" Rudy said, looking at them for a second before turning back to the tv.

"Oh, we worked out, got a cheeseburger and then came in here and asked you what you were watching," Jerry explained, not understanding that Rudy had answered his question, not asked one himself. "What are you watching?"

"What Did You Do?" Rudy said again.

"Dude, I told you," Jerry deadpanned, "We got a cheeseburger, we worked out-"

"No," Rudy interrupted him, "It's the name of my favourite TV show. They use hidden cameras and actors to capture real people doing good deeds."

"Oh, I hate that show," Azalea muttered, "It makes me feel like a terrible human being."

"Excuse me, sir. In Don Quinonas," the host of the show introduced himself to a man in the show, "host of 'What Did You Do?' - My hidden cameras just captured you doing something remarkable. You gave five hundred dollars," Don Quinonas said and Rudy gasped, "to a complete stranger so he could get his cat's broken tail fixed."

Rudy let out a loud sigh like he thought it was the most wonderful thing ever. "Look, he's," he tried to say but it came out a blabbering mess. "Oh, I gotta be on this show, so people will know that I'm better than they are. And humble," he added in afterthought. "So humble."

"Apparently vertebrae, that is the bones that make up a cat's tail can break if the cat falls of a balcony, gets hit by a car or has the tail slam in a door," Azalea read from her phone, having searched up if cat's could break their tails, "Poor kitten."

"Let me get this straight," Jack turned to her, "You laugh every time I get injured - but a stranger's cat gets sympathy."

"What kind of sadist would laugh when an animal gets hurt?" Azalea asked, "Humans deserve what they get most of the time. Animals don't."

☆★☆

In an attempt to get on What Did You Do? he tried to be nice to everyone he met and from what Azalea had seen he was failing miserably. Azalea and Jack were walking towards the dojo when Azalea shared what had happened that morning.

"I only wish I could have gotten it on video," she laughed to herself, "Just imagine Rudy heroically climbing up in a tree to fetch a football only for the branch to snap," she couldn't stop laughing.

"You are a sadist, did you know that?" Jack chuckled, letting go of her hand to wrap an arm around her waist.

"Hey, if I did something like that I'd much rather have people laugh than everyone asking me if I'm okay," Azalea defended, "And even you, the poster boy for politeness, would have laughed if you saw that."

"How is it possible that you are unable to break rules, yet I'm the polite one?" Jack smiled down at her.

"We are perfectly matched," Azalea smirked, "I make sure you don't get in too much trouble and in return you clean up the mess when I'm unintentionally or intentionally rude."

The only response Jack gave her was a chuckle and a kiss against her forehead just as they reached the dojo. But then Azalea felt Jack let go of her as he crouched down to pick up what looked like a wallet.

"Uh, excuse me," Jack said to stop the woman who had dropped it, "Ma'am, you dropped this," he handed her the wallet.

"Excuse me," the guy they had seen on tv the previous day came out of nowhere, "I'm Don Quinonas from the TV show What Did You Do?"