Quarantine swipe

Running

We spent all our sick day on my bed, watching movies and eating chicken soup. Like it was so normal. I felt so comfortable with him. And that was what scared me the most, because it was not enough that I had feelings for him, that I wanted him, no, I also felt as if I could be with him forever, as if I could talk to him about anything or be in silence with him forever.

At some point he was making little circles in my hand with the tip of his finger and it felt so good, sending little sparks to my brain.

Dr. Will: hello sunshine, how are you
Andy: not well, I think I got some food poison
Dr. Will: really that's too bad, I wish I was there to take care of you
Andy: me too

I talked to my mom who was insisting on coming over, but I really didn't wanted her to come, because that meant that this moment with Emerson had to end and I didn't wanted to end.
This moment, him and me, lying in my bed, him touching and caressing my hand, watching a movie. This was my heaven.

I didn't tell Noah anything about me being sick. I didn't wanted him to feel bad. After all I enjoyed the chole.

When the night came Emerson and I fell a sleep in my bed without noticing it.
I slept warm and comfortable at his side. This was the first time in my entire life that I had slept with a man beside me.

I woke up tangled in Emerson's body. His hot body. He felt so warm, his breathing was so calmed, his face so beautiful.

He slowly opened his sleepy eyes, and I could have a look at his intense blue eyes.
"Hey" he said with a sleepy voice
"Hey" I said smiling, I felt happy to wake up at his side.
"I'm sorry, I didn't noticed when I fell asleep" he said
"It's okey, did you sleep well?" I asked
"Well? I slept like a baby" he said stretching his arms.
I smiled.

For a moment we locked our eyes . Emerson looked at me with tenderness and tuck a string of hair behind my ear.
"Are you feeling better?" He asked sweetly.
"Better than ever" I said smiling
Then he put a serious face, and broke our gaze. He stood up from the bed
"I need to take shower" he said and walked slowly out of my room.
I didn't say anything I just laid there in my bed, missing his warm body next to mine, a wave of reality hit me.
And the sane me came back.
No Andy, you can't, you can't fall for him.
I need to push back those feelings. And I don't know why but I think he was pushing his feelings as well.

Noah: hello Andy! Have you heard the news? The state has aloud citizens To hang in open spaces, and to work out outside. And I was wondering if maybe you'll like to go take a walk in Central Park?

In that moment I immediately turned on my tv. I change to the news Chanel and heard the good news.
Noah was right! And I couldn't wait to go outside. I needed a run in Central Park so much.

And at that moment I stood up, put on my work out clothes and left my apartment for the first time in 4 months.

I couldn't believe it.

When I got outside I inhaled the fresh polluted air from New York. That was a great smell.
I looked at the bright summer sky, I have never valued this things before.
But now I appreciate them a lot. There wasn't a lot of cars in the streets, I missed the New York traffic, the horns, the streets crowded with people walking with a hurry. I loved New York so much.  My heart broke at seeing it like this, streets deserted, people walking with masks on their faces.

I went for a run in Central Park and it felt so good. There wasn't a lot of people around and I felt safe, the touch of nature made me so well.

I've learned a lot of things in the last few months. To value and appreciate the small things in life. To have patience, to be with myself.

And I started running, running away from all those 4 months, from all those feelings that I've felt, depression, sadness, my feelings towards Emerson, my happiness, all the junk that I've been eating, the lockdown, the fear.

After my run I went to get my favorite coffee to my favorite coffee shop.
I was so excited when I saw the sign
WE'RE OPEN JUST TAKE OUT

Then I went home and when the elevators door opened I was shocked with what I saw.