Ivan: 07

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These past few days have been nothing but calm.

I couldn't call it bliss, yet ever since that nightmare it seems everyone has backed off some, not teasing me as much. 

Someone in particular has been nothing but kind, his smile effortlessly floating into my mind.

Singing me a lullaby, taking me to the botanical garden, giving me a sunflower….

I felt heat swiftly spread across my cheeks.

Wasn't that how lovers acted?

Now much too warm, I threw off the covers and proceeded to head downstairs. I had to get my mind off of it for now. 

???: Such a shame.

???: I wonder what happened…

Hm? Something feels off; they don't seem as lively as usual. 

Reader: What's going on?

I entered the room to see several of the men crowding around the table. Peering over their shoulders I saw a small cardboard box.

Reader: What is it?

Ludwig let out a sigh, yet this one didn't have the usual agitation it normally did.

Feliciano: Luddy was out grooming the lawn when he saw it.

Reader: It?

Ludwig: Don't call me that. And I had found a dead bird near the bushes.

A dead bird? 

How bizzare. Even while thinking that, it seemed more odd that Ludwig would show the poor creature any kindness, even if only in death.

Feliciano: A cat must've gotten it. 

Alfred: Heh, unless Ivan got to it first.

I jolted at the mention of his name, struggling to grasp what Alfred meant.

Alfred: Don't look at me like that, _. 

Feliciano: How couldn't she, you're bad mouthing her prince after all

Alfred laughed despite wearing a frown.

Alfred: That guy, a prince? Give me a break. He belongs in a mental institution.

How dare he say such terrible things so nonchalantly! Despite Ivan… being Ivan, he didn't deserve to be made fun of like that.

Feliciano and Ludwig seemed awkward, shifting their weight, looking anywhere but at me or Alfred.

He didn't seem to notice, continuing.

Alfred: It's only a matter of time before he kills one of us. Starting with you.

I froze as he pointed a pale finger at me.

No, Ivan wouldn't ever hurt me. He's treated me as gently as glass.

Yet... I thought back to the market where we overheard two women talking about a deranged vampire. It's almost as if the air went cold as Ivan threatened to kill the offender with his bare hands.

It's true Ivan can be scary. Terrifying even. But there's still a small part of me that believes, or wants to believe, that his true self is kind and compassionate.

???: What is this? 

I spun around to see Ivan enter the room, looking at the box on the table. No one answered him, looking at anything else.

Reader: U-umm, Ludwig found it outside. A cat must have caught it…

I watched his smile slowly fade. He reached out towards the lid of the cardboard box, but stopped, fingers hovering.

He clenched his fist, shaking. 

I doubted it was just from the bird. No, he had managed to figure out what was said about him while he was absent.

Clang!

In a flash he brought his fist down into the table, teacups rattling. I didn't have the courage to look him in the eyes, only gazing after him as he stormed out of the room.

Silence.

What should I do? I wanted to say so many things despite not knowing how to put them into words. I glanced over at the teacup, now chipped.

Ludwig lowered his head before stepping closer.

Ludwig: Don't do anything stupid; let him cool off.

He and Feliciano left, only Alfred and I left in the room. 

Ludwig was most likely trying to help, but his warning only made me more confused. If I went now, would he really hurt me? 

It felt like a rock was in my stomach.

Alfred broke the silence with a sigh, standing up.

Alfred: Forget what I said, idiot. But listen to Ludwig, too, or you'll end up worse than that bird.

His eyes were unfeeling and serious as they peered into mine, before he straightened up and walked past me.

Ivan… He's feeling hurt right now, so that's why he lashed out. Yet at the same time, Ludwig would never say anything he didn't mean. 

[Go After Him]

     [Give Him Space]

In the end, I compromised. I'll wait until he's cooled off before going after him. That's all I can do. I just wished I knew why Alfred would say those words to begin with...

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