The mistake

The misery

Jin POV:

I have shut myself in our room for the last two days. I haven't had anything to eat either, I don't have any appetite. Jungkook has been knocking constantly over the last 48 hrs begging me to come out and eat something but I refuse. I can't look at him right now. The anger inside of me hasn't subsided yet. I'm so mad at him. How dare he play with my feeling like that. I shiver as I get underneath my blanket, I've been sweating too much. I think I might have a fever. I should take care of myself not just for me but for my daughter. But I have no energy, I literally cannot even move a muscle right now. A loud whimper comes from my mouth as my body shivers. I hear jungkook knocking but I don't think I can even get up and open the door for me. "Jin please open the door, you're worrying me" I hear him say. So now he cares! He didn't think about me when he was kissing that person. Just the image of them kissing makes me wanna cry but I'm done crying for jungkook. He doesn't deserve any more of my tears. I hear him knocking again and the next thing I know is jungkook breaking down the door and running towards me. I shiver and try to cover myself with the blanket. Jungkook touches my forehead and I wanted to slap his hands away but my body isn't cooperating with me right now. "Jesus Christ you're burning Jin" he says as he takes the blanket off of me. I whine as he picks me up and takes me towards the bathroom. "Please let me help you take a shower, it'll bring your fever down" he says. I let him do whatever he wants to not like I can even say anything. I look at the mirror inside the bathroom, I look pale with big puffy eyes and red nose. I look horrible. Jungkook walks towards me and this is the first time I look him in the eyes. He looks.... terrible too. Dark circles are visible underneath his eyes, his hair is all over the place, and he reeks of alcohol. Jungkook doesn't even drink that often. I couldn't help but worry about him. Is he eating? I don't think he's getting enough sleep. I wanted to touch his face and kiss him. But every time I look at him, that scene shows up in front me as a reminder of how he broke me. He broke my heart. I know he has apologized over and over time. But it took me so long to accept his love for me, how can I just forget about it? I don't know what to believe. His words or my eyes. I want to believe him, I really do because looking at us I know we're both miserable. But I can't. I can't give him the luxury to break my heart again. I just can't go through that again. After giving me a shower he dries me and brings me to the bedroom again. "Jin I know you're upset with me but please please don't punish our little girl. She's the innocent one here. Please for her sake eat something. You haven't eaten in days. That's not good for you, I'm really begging you to eat." He says joining his hands in front of me. I just turn my head and give him a slight nod. I know our girl is innocent. I would never want to hurt her but this heaviness in my chest is overpowering everything. "Thank you, stay here I'll bring you some food" he says before walking away. I sigh as I rub my belly, I can feel her inside of me. She's the only motivation I have right now. I hear jungkook come in with a tray full of food. My mouth starts to water at the sight of food, I haven't had anything in two days, that's a new record for me. He places the tray on the side table "let me feed you, you look tired" he says as he takes a full spoon of rice and tries to feed me. I push the spoon away making the rice fall all over the bed "I can eat by myself. I don't need you jungkook. Just leave me alone, go away. I don't ever wanna see your face" I say with gritted teeth. I can see the hurt expression on his face, his eyes starts to get a little teary. It hurts watching him like this. I just wanna reach over and hug him. "I'll leave if that's what you want just please eat your food" he says before leaving me alone in this big bedroom. All alone. No, no you're suppose to fight for us jeon jungkook.You're suppose to fight for me. Is he giving up on us? Did I give up on us? I can't help but think of all the hurtful things I've said to jungkook over the last couple days. I admit that I have been not helpful but I can't help it. I let jungkook in my heart and my life and look what happened. I try to ignore the tears behind my own eyes as I finish eating my food. I need to stay strong for my little girl. I decided to get up to put the dishes away. I walk over to see jungkook drinking in his office with his door just slightly open. I peak inside and look at all the mess he's made of his office. Papers are all over the floor. Has he been just drinking? Should I go in and ask if he had some food? He catches me standing outside the door and immediately comes to me and takes the dishes from my hands "I'll put it away" he says as he walk to the kitchen. "You're reeking of alcohol jungkook" I say crossing my arms. He leans over the sink before saying "yeah that's how I deal with stress" he says with a chuckle. "Jin I know-" before he could finish his sentence I cut him off "save it jungkook. I don't need your half hearted apologies." I say already walking away. I hear him sigh before he says "what do you want from me jin? I've apologized so many times, I've explained to you the whole situation. What else do you want from me?" He says making me turn around. "What else do I want from you? For starters how about loyalty?" I say walking towards him with anger. "I just want your loyalty jungkook and you couldn't even give that to me" I say scoffing. "Jin I'm telling you there's nothing between tae and I. It's all just a misunderstanding." He says cupping my face. "Don't you dare touch me" I say removing his hands from my face immediately missing the warmth of his fingers. "Jin please" he says with such sadness in his voice. He sounds broken. "Jungkook please tell me something"

"Was I a mistake?"