The mistake

The decision

Seokjin POV:

I am so angry and I'm angry over the fact that I'm mad at someone who's oblivious to everything, its just I saw the way he looked at the beautiful blonde male who's probably the most beautiful human I've ever seen. I was gonna come clean and tell Jungkook about this pregnancy but I can't not when I don't know what I want. I've never thought about having kids ever, it took me so long to accept myself and now I'm just gonna get side lined again. 

I walk towards the restroom and get inside a stall and the urge to cry my lungs out is so high right now but I can't I'm still at work. I can't seem to do anything I desire these days. And this baby isn't helping either, I've been sick to my stomach this whole past month. it shouldn't have to be this hard should it? why is my mind keep making excuses for ending my misery instead of being happy that I have a life inside of me but isn't it selfish to bring a child in this world I know I wouldn't take care of, he or she won't have any grandparents, not even a father - I can't do this to him, he looked so happy hugging that blonde male I can't take his happiness away as much as it hurts me. 

"Hyung, you don't look good" Jimin says as he stands in front of me by my desk. I smile to assure him that I'm okay; I am not but I don't wanna be a burden to anyone. "Hyung seriously you look really pale" he says as he touches my forehead "You're burning too Hyung, we need to get you to a hospital" "Jimin-ah, I am fine I swear its just a little fever it'll go away" I say tiredly. seriously I am blessed to have Jimin in my life, he's the friend I've always wanted since I was little but fate had some other plans for me. "Can you stop being so stubborn for once please, just let me take you home at least?" he pleads and its so hard for me to say no to him so I comply. "I'll be back, I'll inform Mr. Jeon and then we can leave okay?" I nod not having any energy to speak. He comes back and helps me get up, I feel so dizzy, I can barely walk but with Jimin's support I was able to make it to the garage. He settles me in his car and we leave to my house. As soon as I get home I run towards the bathroom and start throwing. Jimin pats my back as he hands me a towel to clean myself up. "Hyung you're worrying me" he says with watery eyes. I pull him in a hug and that's all it took for my heart to pour as I start sobbing against his chest. "Please talk to me Hyung" he pleads patting my head as I continue to cry in his comfort. After couple minutes, I regain my strength and push myself away from Jimin's warm embrace, I look at him to noticing his tear stains. I need to come clean to him for my own sanity I don't think I can hold it to myself anymore. I try to stand up with Jimin's help and take him towards my couch. "I need to tell you something Jimin-ah, please don't be disappointed" I cry scared to shit disappointing him. he hugs me and says, "You'll never disappoint me Hyung, you know I love you a lot right?" I nod against his shoulders. "Jimin-ah, I am pregnant" I say unable to look him in the eyes. "WAIT WHAT? how I mean I know how duh but when? who? omg Hyung are you okay? he says cupping my cheeks and brining my chin up, and all I see his worry in his eyes- he's not disappointed? "You're not mad?" "Hyung, omg off course not I'm only mad at the fact that you din't tell me this before but I'm not mad at you at all just very surprised, I was not expecting this" he says feeling embarrassed a little. "Hyung can I ask you a question?" I nod and he asks me the one question I hoped he wouldn't "who's the other father?" my head bows down immediately, really not ready to answer that question at the moment but I know I have to face the truth so I mutter a small "Jeon Jungkook""Sorry I think I heard you wrong it felt like you said Jeon Jungkook you know as in our new boss" he chuckles. I remain silent and he screams as he gets up and yells"ARE YOU SERIOUS?" I nod unable to looking him in the eyes for the nth time today. "Omg omg omg does he know?" he asks me while pacing around my living room. I shake my head, "fuck"he whispers. "Jimin can you stop pacing around you're giving me anxiety" "Right sorry Hyung" he sits on his knees in front of me taking my hands into his warm ones "Hyung what are you gonna do?" he asks sincerely and I appreciate his concern. "I don't know Jimin, but I don't think I can go along with this alone" "You're right Hyung, you need talk to Mr. Jeon ASAP" he says. "I don't mean that Jimin" I sigh as I look him in the eye and say the next words that pained me a lot but I have to do this "Jimin-ah I'm talking about a termination" He looks shocked as he gets up from his kneeling position. "Hyung are you completely sure this is what you want?" he asks me looking sad I nod"Its a rational decision Jimin, I can barely take care of me how am I suppose to take care of child that was not made out of love huh? I just can't do it" I cry out that last sentence. "Off course I understand Hyung, its your body, if you're not ready then I support your decision but I still believe that you should let Jungkook know about your decision" he replies. "But how about we get out of this depressive conversation and order some pizzas and pig out what do you say Hyung?" he asks me smiling I nod "that sounds perfect right now." 

As soon as Jimin left after we ate 3 large pizzas by ourselves or well mostly me, I make my doctors appointment. this will be over soon I think as I place my hand on my flat stomach. "Hyung, you should've taken me with you to this appointment" Jimin whines over the phone after calling me because of my work absence, "I wanna do this by myself Jimin ill see you later okay?" "Okay Hyung, take care and call me after you're done we'll have a sleep over at your place" he says over the phone. "Okay now hang up kid" I chuckle knowing damn well what he's tryna do. "Mr. Kim?" a nurse calls for me, I follow her to the room. the doctor comes in after the nurse took my vitals and asked me some questions. "Mr. Kim, I need you to sign this consent form about your abortion" he says handing me a paper. I hate that word. I take the pen holding it tightly unable to move it.

I knock on the door loudly and see Jungkook - wearing a very formal outfit ready to go out - looking shockingly at me. "I couldn't do it" I cry as my body moves towards him embracing it tightly.