Concrete Rose. ✓

12

Beyoncé Knowles

I didn't take the pregnancy tests.

After Shawn has said what he said and then left me there to contemplate on the whole situation, I stashed the test in an old box under my bed and went to bed early. I haven't seen or talked to him since. Everyone in my family can tell I've been a little off, so I'm trying to play the situation as safely as I can.

Ever since Shawn told me it was him texting back through Lauren's phone, I've been trying to decide on where or not I should tell her. It's not that I can't trust her. It's just that I'm scared that she's gonna suggest take the test and it comes out positive. I'm going to have to take it regardless.

"So what's going on with you lately sis?" Lauren asked.

The two of us had just got done with a little bit of shopping and lunch. We were about an hour away from home so I had some time to chat.

"It's been a good minute since we've hung out. I know you've been busy with conferences and me with court dates and shit, but let's catch up. What's been going on with you?"

I shook my head, "So much sis." I replied.

"So much like?" She asked. "The 'where you're going to play ball' shit?"

I hissed through my teeth. "Girl, I'm honestly not even thinking about basketball anymore."

"Why?"

"Cause," I started. "I might be pregnant."

Lauren slammed on the brakes. She was in utter shock just as I knew she would be. I sank down in my seat, closing my eyes as I felt her staring deep into my soul.

"You might be pregnant? By who? Shawn?"

I nodded as warm tears rolled down my face.

"D-Don't cry, Bey. It's gonna be okay?"

"No, it's not cause my Dad wants me to play basketball, my Mom is gonna be upset and Shawn doesn't want a baby."

"You told Shawn?"

"When I texted you the other night, that was him replying to me. I texted you and asked could you bring me some pregnancy test. He showed up to my Dad's house with them. We got into an argument about the possibility of me being pregnant and he acted like he didn't care. Sounds like he was going for me to get an abortion."

I broke down softly.

"Not only that, I just know if I am, my Dad is going to be the same way. There's no way he's gonna let me keep a baby while I'm in so much of the news and the media."

Lauren's seemed as if she was trying to find the right words. She was obviously still trying take in what I was telling her.

"So he doesn't want the baby?"

"No. He said if it comes out positive, I know what I need to do."

She shook her head, "I'm not believing that shit."

"I swear I cried all fucking night."

"Did you take the test?"

"No."

"Well you need to take the test sis. It's the only way you can find out for yourself without letting the media know." She said. "You know regardless of the bullshit Shawn is on, I'mma be there for you no matter your decision. I know how you feel cause I was the same way with Cam. You just gotta get past the reality of taking the test and seeing the results. You gotta do it babe, especially before you start traveling for the workouts and scrimmages."