How Dare You?

XLVII - Mine

Nagising ako ng maramadaman ko na may nakahawak sa braso ko, dahan-dahan ako niyuyugyog para gumising.

"Lex.." I heard a man's voice at agad akong kinabahan, I suddenly had an urge to fight back and stop. I felt like being with Liam, "No, no, stop!" I shouted as I try to swat the hands away.

Someone held my head on both sides, "Hey.. hey.. baby.." I opened my eyes and saw Kit. Agad tumulo yung luha ko as I felt my whole my body relieved from tension. Agad akong niyakap ni Kit as he was trying to calm me down.

"It's okay baby.. It's me, I'm sorry I scared you.." He continued caressing my back and kept hugging me as my tears had stopped.

Nagpapakalma pa ko. Ayoko magising ng ganito araw-araw. Ayoko na bigla na lang ako natatakot as if I'm not safe from anyone at anytime. The trauma that Liam left me is even beyond imaginable.

Nagulat ako ng biglang may tumunog na phone. Kit reached for my phone and checked the caller ID, he looked at me as if he was waiting for me to tell him to answer the phone. I briefly nodded.

"Hello." Kit greeted.

"She's really not feeling well, I'll have her call you back later today. Is this something urgent?", I was just staring at him as he converse with whoever is on the line.

"Alright. Thanks. Have a good one too." Then he hang up.

"It was Hayley, she mentioned about some paperwork that needs to be done and sent tomorrow and she wants to remind you of those important ones." He explained.

"Okay." I briefly replied.

Tinaasan niya ko ng kilay, "Will you be going to work?", Masungit at nanunuri niyang tanong.

"I'll be thinking about it." Mahina kong sagot. Hindi ko alam kung kaya ko pang pumasok. Pero alam kong dapat, I don't have anything to rely on and I definitely need to make a living.  "I somehow need to sustain my finances." I continued when he didn't gave any reaction.

"Baby, I'd give you the world if you ask me to. You don't have to work somewhere you won't be comfortable. And I don't want you working there anymore."

"Huh?" Gulo kong tanong. Kung tutuusin, hindi ko alam kung ano talaga tinatakbo ng isip ko, tungkol ba kay Liam, or sa takot na nararamdaman ko dahil sa ginawa niya. Kahit yung presensya ni Kit at bakit niya ginagawa to eh malabo pa din para sa akin.

"Things have been rough for you, and I'm sorry for letting this happen to you.." He started as he held both my hands and looked me straight in the eyes. I felt butterflies in my stomach and I can hear my own heart pounding, it's like my body missed all this tingling sensation from this man.

"And I want to be here with you. Alam ko may mga kasalanan ako sayo and I want to ask for your forgiveness and make up for all the pain I have caused you. Baby, you ran away from me again. It almost drove me mad and crazy. Para kong mababaliw nung di na kita naabutan sa Macau at hindi na kita mahagilap. Maisie has been playing with me, she wasn't even pregnant when I got to talk to her. When Natalie knew, na nawawala ka, she bravely confessed how Maisie set me up that night, I was so drunk that all she can do was to take pictures and pretend that something happened to us. Kahit wala naman. I'm sorry kung di ko agad inalam yung totoo, I was so focused wanting to keep you near me. You have been my strength and my weakness baby, it has always been."

I was stunned. Hindi ko alam kung ano sasabihin ko. All along sinira lang kami ni Maisie, at ako naman itong sumuko agad kay Kit at sinisi lang siya. I should have known better.

"I'm sorry for blaming you.. I'm sorry for leaving.. I was scared and naive.."

"I don't care baby." He interrupted as he gave me a sweet smile and kissed the tip of my nose. "You're mine again, I will stay with you and I'll make that douche pay for what he did. I love you. So much." He hugged me tight as I felt the tears roll down my cheek.

"Thank you." I whispered.

Muli siyang humarap sakin with teary eyes and a sweet smile. "I love you. And you don't have to go back to work. We'll have everything fixed."

I nodded. "Are we going home to the Philippines?" I curiously asked. Hindi ko alam kung handa na ko harapin sila Mama. I do miss her. God, I miss Sophie too. Ilang beses na kong na-tempt na tawagan sya. I had her phone rang, one time. Pero, pinanghinaan ako ng loob. And I also promised my brother to call him once I'm ready. Pero after Liam, I don't think this is a good time.

"Do you want to?" He asked.

Umiling ako, "I think I need a bit more time." Nahihiya kong sagot as I met his eyes.

"As long as you want baby." He smiled and kissed my forhead.

God, kahit gaano naging kagulo kaming dalawa, my love for him has never changed. Naisantabi ko pero hindi nawala. I still love this guy even if I had to leave over and over again.

"I missed you." I bravely told him and I felt a relief right in my chest.