white boys (river phoenix)

38

Chapter Thirty Eight

(Thursday) Robin was not in the Halloween spirit. Surely, everyone else was dressed up in their costumes, some extravagant, some simple, and others too vulgar to be at school in (no one minded much). The only real kick Robin got out of today was seeing some white guy parading around dressed as Michael Jackson and playing Thriller on a boombox while skateboarding down the hallway with a band of people in Jackson Five costumes following him, only for him to crash into the janitor, Mr. Filch. Now that was funny- even Feldman couldn't top that. But other than that, she had been tossing and turning the whole night before thinking about River and what her coworkers had said and his question- that dreaded question she never even thought he was going to ask.

She knew what she had to do, and she knew it was going to be a punch in the face to her pride, and to her damaged ego. Her mind wanted to be logical, less feeling-based and tell her no, while her heart was beating the opposite rhythm. But just thinking about the technicalities and when and where and how it would go down stressed her out, draining her emotionally and physically- she could barely focus during math class where Mr. Pointer was dragging on and on about some shit he probably didn't even understand. He never did know what he was talking about.

Robin hadn't yet seen River today, but the knowledge that she would soon be seeing him kept reappearing in her brain cloud, and giving her heart a great pang in addition. Her heart was thumping with uneasiness and it was pounding so fast and hard that it felt like it was going to propel out of her chest, but she was determined to do this. She had to, to put an end to everything that had been troubling her, to-

"Robin," Stacey had snapped from in front of her.

Robin looked up, intercepted from her thoughts, a pensive palm had been resting on her chin,

"Yes?"

Stacey raised her brows judgmentally,

"Class is over. The bell rang."

"What?" Robin asked, genuinely surprised.

She must not have heard the bell ring while she was off daydreaming- more like nightmaring. She had been so into her thoughts that she wasn't even able to hear the brash bell ring, the way it did everyday, able to wake her up from even the deepest of sleep.

"Yeah. Don't just sit there like an idiot," Stacey huffed with raised brows.

Robin rolled her eyes hard, and the words seemed to slip off of her tongue as smooth as butter on a hot biscuit,

"Shut up, Stacey. Stop being such a bitch. You won homecoming, the only thing I assume you find important being the pretty, good hair princess you are, who really doesn't even have that great of a personality to match your oh-so-gorgeous generic white girl looks. Oh, but even the prettiest of girls have their ugly moments- need I remind you of the time you had your hair jammed in the door while you were pissed drunk? Now hop off my ass, I have shit to do... other than try to sabotage other peoples' personal lives for a fucking plastic crown."

Stacey scoffed indignantly as if Robin had just hit her with a petty jab- which she did, and muttered under her breath as she stomped away,

"Freak."

Even Robin was taken aback by herself, and it took her a while for her heart to stop racing with anticipation (because really, she had been holding back her tongue even during her rant, and her fists). Maybe just knowing that she was about to do and say something way bigger than what she just had reassured her that she'd recover quickly from that outburst. She swung her backpack on, one shoulder after the other, and waved goodbye to Mr. Pointer as she started to walk up the rows of student desks.