Impulse (Published)

Nine

There was something arousing about being wanted but not making it known.

It was like being touched in public, but having to be discreet about it and keep your face the same way, acting like nothing was happening.

Even though that only happened once in the 7th grade at Applebee's with my cousins best friend, it sure as hell gave me a rush.

My book began to take a turn for drama as well, I added a plot.

With erotica it was tricky, mostly people think of 50 Shades of Grey when they hear erotica and I loathed that book.
The format and storyline was weak and gave BDSM a poor name. It had everyone and their sister claiming they liked BDSM.
Christian was no Dominant. And Ana was nowhere close to a submissive.

As for a love story- if they took out BDSM, it would've been a decent novel.

I wanted to include passion in my story, something to make people's head turn.
The worst possible scenario to take place and the characters would come out with bruises, a few broken bones, maybe a baby or two. Something that's worth fighting for.

I wanted heat, turmoil. That made the sex hot. It made it raunchy, forbidden, wanton, intense.

I wanted the main character In my story to feel torn. I wanted her to be someone to look up to...someone I could look up to.

I eventually found myself, writing about myself. Well how I wished to be, of course I kept that to myself and everyone seemed to love it.

It was Sunday and I was spending the night with Aryiana since Sage wanted to spend some time with her cousin, Jared.

Violet was sick with the flu and so it just left us two.

"Marley, you're book is epic. I can never read it in a public place without gasping or growling. You're really making Eva go through some shit."
Eva was the name of my main female character and now a young heroin to many.

"I want to make it interesting and not just about sex you know?" I say as I reach over to grab a towel since I was about to take a shower.

"Well you're doing a hell of a good job." She murmured and I smiled and grabbed some clothes to throw on afterwards.

"Sage suspects about me."Aryiana adds as I pause to sit across from her on her hammock inside her room,

"Oh?" I ask.
"We all know Sage is far from discreet. She was all like, "Have you seen the new show Faking It? It's about girls who are pretending to be lesbians. It makes me wonder, do you think anyone we know is a lesbian? Can't be Violet or me. Plus Marley is writing that book'" I cover my mouth and laugh as Aryiana rolls her eyes.
"I was like 'Dumb-ass that leaves me!'" Aryiana grins and I continue to laugh as I imagine Sage, sighing and acting all dramatic.

"So she knows?" I ask and Aryiana just simply shrugs.
"That's all I said and she shrugged it off afterwards. I don't think she knows how to feel about it." Aryiana admits.
"How do you feel about her knowing?" I ask her and she shrugs again.

"It's about time. Besides, I'm tired of holding in my gay comments. Everytime we watch American Horror Story and I see that sexy ass maid-" she pauses and licks her lips and my eyes widen.

"Ary!" I exclaim and She flinches back."What? You know- so get used to it sugar." She says giggling and I roll my eyes.

"Yeah yeah yeah. Well I'm going to go shower. I feel all sweaty from our run earlier." I say and slip into her bathroom.

I place my phone on the counter and strip of my clothes, I run the water until it's hot and turn the shower on.

My phone lights up and I see I have more comments on my book. I get them daily and I wish I could reply to all of them but I just simply smile and screenshot them. It helps motivate me and reminds me that I do have a passion and I'm good at it.