Teach Me How To Love

What The Heart Wants

~ Selena ~

"So how was tonight's show?" The voice that broke through my phone speakers snapped me back into reality for the hundredth time these past few days. Nick had cleared some time in his schedule to face-call me as I gave him my best genuine smile.

"The show was amazing." Which was true. Demi hopped off stage and swerved through the crowd, causing her team a headache. While I on the other hand, sung my heart out. I always gave it my all for every show. At this moment in time the bus was bumping along down the road towards the next city. Our final day off would be in the morning.

"Any new song ideas or are you still working on it?"

"I haven't really given much thought to my music. My mom hasn't called back to check up on me either."

"She trusts you'll get it done."

"And I will." There seemed to be less to talk about with Nick lately. He was content with mostly speaking business with me. Normally I would find things to tell him and we'd go on for hours. "How is everything going with planning out your tour?" I questioned him.

Although he began answering me, I sort of zoned out. He was laughing and telling me jokes about certain songs and how he was trying to organize his set list. The only thing I really wanted to do was speak to Demi. After laser tag we didn't really have time to talk much. She went her way and I had gone mine. Her bus even left the lot first, which was a little odd on her end.

"Selena!" My name being called caused me to face the screen.

"Yeah?"

"What's going on with you?"

"Nothing." I lied.

"Nothing as in 'something?"'

"I'm just tired that's all." I could feel a bubble form in my throat. Lying wasn't my best quality and I usually felt guilty about it. But at this very moment, my mind and my heart were playing tug of war, and my heart was starting to sway my head. Oh no. I was beginning to understand the confusion going through me and I wasn't sure if I was ready to accept the outcome.

"You weren't listening to me were you?" I hadn't noticed he had still been speaking.

"I'll call you in the morning." I sent my love, closing the app before lying against my headboard. My chest was drumming as my ears warmed. There were parts of me that still wanted Nick, and my heart was definitely a fighting contender. But there was something about Demi that slowly began to sway my heart and take over what was happening in my head. I grabbed my phone once again, flipping though the contacts as fast as I could. My finger hovered over the woman's name, my eyes studying her picture just as the bus slowed down.

"Just a shortcut!" I heard Nancy yell from the front cabin. I settled down, cupping my phone between my hands. After kissing Demi during laser tag she allowed her fingers to wander down my back. An action that sent chills through me, as if she was breaking down every wall I ever had. But reality always set back in. In a sense I belonged to Nick. After a few minutes of allowing my mind to wander, I pressed Demi's name on the screen, calling her. I had never once felt nervous hearing the pause and ringing tones through the speaker and yet now, it paralyzed me. I wasn't going to confess having feelings for her, but they were definitely there. She knew it because we at least spoke out loud clearly stating we wanted something from the other, but we knew we were off limits.

"Pick up." I whispered, placing the device against my ear. Nothing. The dial tone soon clicked on as I rolled my eyes. Whatever she was up to, I would have some select words for her. I smiled at the thought. It was as if we were each other's little secret and as long as we were on tour, no one else would have to know about it. I fell asleep sometime between gazing at my phone and studying it's clock. I awoke after hearing a group of voices fill the air. I quickly sat up, stumbling out to where Nancy should have been sitting. Bright lights filled whatever space we were parked in. As a few voices died down, shadows began to linger past as I pressed my nose against the door's window. It was our crew members, making their way out into the distance as I realized we made it to the next hotel. I pushed open the door, finding Nancy chatting with one of the other driver's.