Daydream away//Michael G. Clifford

Michael

Michael,

Michael Gordon Clifford I love you, from the first day we met.Assembly in primary school ,the first day of year 2 (3 for you.)

I was sat on the floor, you on the bench and sat pulling on my braids(mum told me that was because you liked me and i guess she was right.)Until Luke came over and laughed before realising It was me and he kicked you in the balls.

Since that day I've admired you because you took a kick in the balls off Luke very well and he has always had fucking huge feet.Also your balls are perfectly fine.

I love you, you where the first guy to tell me that you meant it and I really believe you did, probably still do.

Michael they will always be a lot for me to say to you, but here sat on a roof drinking a bottle of Vodka and writing just after I have swallowed about 6 Codeine I just want you here.Here holding me making sure I'm okay; we where laid on top of each other on the bus sleeping and we've been closer than that.Some how though I felt closer to you reading the letter you wrote me before we even dated but now I'm writing yours and I'm going away.

Maybe I'll tell you that I'm leaving to Melbourne (left when you've read this) but I don't want to hurt you.Even though you hurt me so fucking bad letting that girl suck your dick I'd never hurt you, not intentionally.

When we got Shadow that made me so happy just to see you that excited.I love you and I'm sorry that I've just fucked off but god knows what I would have done without you.

Annie; you never met her but I wish you did, she would have thought you where great especially the hair.Her hair it was bright pink, that's how I'd find her when she was sat out in the field waiting for Luke and I.I did the same with you, in school I'd search for you and even if you dyed your hair the day before and I forgot I'd listen, listen for your laugh or look for your bright green eyes.

When I come back please be in the airport so I can look for you, if your not there too look for I'll be lost.

If i see you before I go I'm going to tell you that I love you and that you... You should find someone else because I've went away to try be happy and I want you too be as well as me.
I love you though remember that... Stay happy Clifford.

Okay!

Love from Katie x

"K go to sleep."Jai said pulled me closer until he felt the piece of paper.
"Michaels?"
"Read it Jai I can't let go of the past until my futures seen what's in it.My future's you Jai I love you."
"Katie move in with me, I know it's only been a couple months but I also know you don't want to be with your Aunt the whole time your hear."
"Your right maybe I should you make me happy so why shouldn't I."
"You definitely should, that is if your okay with my brother and his girlfriend Living with us too?We don't have to share a room if you don't want too."
"Perfectly fine, just read it please."
"In the morning I love you."

Jai fell back asleep and my phone started to ring so I answered walking outside and sitting on the porch.

"Michael hi."
"I was reading your letter again when are you coming home?"
"I was reading it too, the first time since.I don't know Clifford it's good here and I have Jai."
"You still with him he better treat you right?"
"We're just really close friends.But I'm moving in with him and his brother and his girlfriend."
"Cosy."Michael sighed and I could tell he didn't want to talk about Jai.

"I got a tattoo."
"Great."I thought more enthusiastic he suggested it during sex for fuck sake.
"Michael are you okay?"
"No I'm not fucking okay you left, everyone fucking leaves.Even the fucking dog won't stay with me, our dog.He's with Luke for fuck sake come home I need you and... But your with him now and your happy so I'll go but I'm here if you need me."
"Michael wait look your the..."

It was then I realised the line was dead and Michaels gone... Doesn't want to talk to me.

"For fuck sake."I shouted shorting my phone to the floor and it bounced on the corner.

"babe come back to bed get some sleep."
"Jai I can't fucking sleep okay... He has Insomnia and it never crossed my mind until then that he couldn't fucking sleep unless he spoke to me.He called Jai he doesn't want me in his life."
"Katie.He'll find someone else to talk him to sleep and you don't need to worry cause you have me there for you Hemmings.I hate seeing this I fucking love you okay always will your my best friend."

"Jai, thanks for everything the last 3 months."he helped me up and I stood in his arms.
"I love you that's what you do for people you love."
"What are you suggesting?"

Glaring at him I pulled my jumper over my hands nervous and sighed backing away from him,
"We've never made it official."
"Because there's nothing to make official we're just friends with benefits Jai.Leave me be, I need to sort my self out before I commit to anyone else."

Turning around I jogged towards my car and got in stepping on the peddle before Jai could run after me.

I still love Michael and fuck I need to talk to him before I agree to anything with Jai but I can't so I called my brother.

"Lu-Luke."I cried pulling over into the sidewalk.
"Katie what's going on?"
"Jai addmited that he loves me and I panicked, I don't love him enough yet to be with him."
"Tell him that."
"But he'll leave, everyone leaves just like Michael said."
"You spoke to Michael?"
"He called yeh."
"He wouldn't mind would he?"

Luke paused for a moment and I got a little worried,
"No not at all, just go for it but if he hurts you i'll fucking kill him."
"I'm going to wait a while Luke thank you i love you bye."
"Love you too."