28 | The Intercom

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I could hear my heartbeat in my ears I couldn't feel my fingers

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I could hear my heartbeat in my ears I couldn't feel my fingers.

My vision was hazy and held my head in between my legs as I tried to even my breathing.

Everything hurt so bad.

You did this.

No I didn't

She didn't deserve that.

Yes she did. She hurt us.

My mind was yelling at me.

I was confused. I thought I did the right thing. She hurt me. I had to hurt her back. I had to get her back.

She doesn't know how much she has hurt me. She's the cause of everything.

You know that's a lie.

The opposite thoughts are driving me insane and I can't concentrate. I can't remember how to breathe.

How do I breathe again?

Oh my god I can't breathe.

My breathe got caught in my throat as I tried to remember how to breath only to panic even more as I slowly start to accidentally suffocate myself.

Panicking even more my hands reach up to my neck and in response I started scratching at my neck. My long nails leaving blood trails in response to the scratches.

My entire body was so sore and tired and my eyelids felt heavy as my chest burned in pain from the lack of air.

I was so out of it I didn't even hear anyone entering my room until I felt those familiar hands around me.

For a while I tried to pry her hands off of me as the need for air took over.

You need to breathe.

I can't remember how!

I struggled with getting my hands free as my thoughts ran through my head.

Please! I can't breathe!

Suddenly my ear was against their chest and they had one my hands surrounding their wrist.

"Hey, hey. Hi little bee. It's okay. You're okay. Breathe with me. Alright. Hear listen to my heart beat. Hold my hand, feel my pulse. Try and match your breaths to that. You're okay." Her rough voice slowly got through to my panicked thoughts and the chaos in my mind slowly calmed.

No, no, no, no!

She's the one who did this to me. I can't let her help me.

Calm down! She just wanted to help you.

No she doesn't she just wants something else to rub in my face.

She has never rubbed anything she has done to you in your face. My subconscious reasoned but my mind was jumbled and I wasn't trying to listen.

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